How soon is too soon to introduce a new partner to your kids? 2 years ago

How soon is too soon to introduce a new partner to your kids?

Is just four weeks after splitting from the family too soon to be introducing your kids to a new partner?

And is it OK for an ex to introduce the person he cheated with to his children?

They're the questions that one Mumsnet user put to the forum this week after her ex Facetimed his new girlfriend with his kids just four weeks after leaving the family home.

The anonymous mum explained that she and her partner of 19 years had separated four weeks ago after he was caught having an affair.

How soon is too soon to introduce a new partner to your kids?

She said that while visiting their two children, aged 8 and 9, the man Facetimed the woman he had been cheating with and introduced her to the kids over the phone.

"Kids (9 and 8) were told Saturday why he left," she wrote on Mumsnet.

"Yesterday he FaceTimed OW (other woman) during contact with kids and got them to say Hi.

"I'm broken... Not sure how much more I can take... my poor babies."

She added that he'd agreed not to introduce them to the new woman but has gone back on his promise.

"He's told kids she's his girlfriend. He also spoke affectionately 'bye honey' on phone so kids are confused/upset by this too.

How soon is too soon to introduce a new partner to your kids?

"They are already having to have extra support in school as they are crying and I've told him this but he makes no comment.

"This is damaging them so much. He only sees them a few hours a week, takes them to park so doesn't see affect on them."

Many were in agreement that the children's father was out of order for what he did.

"No it is not okay at all. Just play it down to your dc (dear children) calling her a friend of Daddy's and giving it no weight at all."

"Is he missing the sensitivity gene? That is awful. So sorry for you and your children. He is an arse."

"What a selfish utter bastard. He deserves to never see them again."

A number of mums advised that while the situation is tough, all the woman can do is be there for her children or refuse to let him see them.

"Assume this is the new normal and proceed with caution and wariness. Your children will eventually realise but unfortunately we can’t make people be decent humans."

"It is incredibly painful but other than refusing contact there's nothing to be done."