I think we can all agree that people tend to have a lot to say about new mums.
More specifically, they tend to have a lot of opinions about the way we all gestate/birth/feed/raise our kids.
In fact, pretty much from the moment you announce you are expecting, prepare to be inundated with some seriously unsolicited advice and thinly veiled suggestions that you are somehow doing it wrong.
Yes, it is all about to come your way – so to prepare you, we have rounded up 10 of the absolute most irritating things people tend to say to new mums. Here goes:
1. “You look tired”
Yeah? Well, that’s probably because I am. Thank you for pointing it out, though!
2. “Is he good?”
Well, he is a four-week-old infant, so I guess it would be wrong to call him ‘bad,’ no?
3. “Breast is best”
Sure, boobs are the business. But guess what? Whether I use those boobs to feed babies or just to look good in a swimsuit is really none of your business, is it?
4. “Sleep when he sleeps”
Really? OK, then. Will you come over to my house and butter my toast and wash my hair then? Because when she sleeps is literally the only time I have to get either of those done.
5. “You’re making a rod for your own back!”
Well, again, that is really none of your business, is it? Also; who are you to decide what is spoiling babies and what is just good aul’ mum instinct on my part?
6. “Cherish every moment”
Every moment? Really? Because there are a lot of moments that seem a little too gross or unpleasant to feel very ‘cherish-y’ about. Explosive poop? Mastitis? Sleeplessness? I’m happy enough to just endure these moments, I don’t feel like I have to cherish them, to be honest.
7. “It won’t last!”
This is usually in response to anything you say about enjoying being a parent. To which I would just like to say: “SHUT UP, IT ACTUALLY MIGHT LAST!”
8. “Oh bless him. He has a little birthmark/blotchy skin/funny-shaped head/cradle cap?”
Ah, thanks for mentioning all the things I have been worrying about so I can worry about them some more.
9. “Have you got her into a consistent bedtime routine?”
Sure. I routinely put her to bed and she consistently wakes up.
10. “When are you having the next one?”
I’ll get back to you on that one, just let me check out of the maternity ward with this one please, OK?
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