My little girl runs around in her ‘spare’ feet all the time and my son swears there is a child in his class called bird-poo. (I still haven’t figured that one out yet)
Here at HerFamily HQ, our editor’s daughter calls her school EveryKateTogether (Educate Together) and another team member’s son calls the mantle piece the mental piece. That sounds like my kind of mad house.
The things our little ones come out with are endearing and hilarious but often very baffling. They are also sometimes very, very rude. Or perhaps it is the way we adults interpret them!
We had great fun compiling some of the funniest things children have said by mistake, and we dare you not to laugh:
1. I went to pick my oldest up from playschool and my end of day report included this story: While outside on the playground, my darling daughter spotted a chipmunk. She yelled, “Look a Shit-munk!” All of her friends were very excited. When corrected and told it was pronounced Chipmunks – her reply, “yeah, that is what I said” and for the rest of the day and weeks to come, they were known as “shit-munks’. And all of her friends pronounced it that way too.
A few short weeks later- it was getting cold, and my little gem strikes again. She walks up to the teacher pointing to her lips, “My lips are chapped. I need some ‘shit-stick.’ (Joy from rantsfromommyland)
2. When my son was three, I was cooking dinner, and he was drawing at the dinner table. He asked me “Mommy, do you have a penis?” and then before I could answer he said “Oh no, wait….you have a….um….a…..BEARD!” (Anonymous from rantsfrommommyland)
3. My 6-year-old son also told me at the supermarket this week “Mum, I can’t walk anymore. My legs will kill me!” (HerFamily team)
4. For the life of me, I can not explain why, but my daughter used to sing “Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the way. Oh, what fun, the Israelites in a one horse open sleigh. Hey!” (Anonymouse from Rantsfrommommyland)
5. My son mixes up terrific and horrific as in “Thanks for the birthday card Granny, it is horrific.” (HerFamily team)
6. My friend’s 4-year-old nephew can’t pronounce the word ‘stick.’ He once told us (while holding a stick and popping bubbles with it), “I pop bubbles with my big dick!” (Anonymous from Rantsfrommommyland)
7. When my 10-year old was little, she used to tell everyone that she loved Star Whores instead of Star Wars. (Stacy from Rantsfrommommyland)
8. There was a child in my sons class who referred to Percy from Thomas and the Tank Engine as ‘Pussy’. To make the distinction between the original, stop-motion animation and the newer CG version, the little guy would reference “Pussy” and “Super Pussy” respectively and announce loudly that he MUCH preferred “Super Pussy.” (Clio from Rantsfrommommyland)
9. Every time we go for a run, my six-year-old talks about the “rabbit fox.” I keep trying to explain that there was a RABID fox in our area, so we need to be careful if we see any wild animals. I think he’s on the lookout for some fantastic rabbit-fox combination. (Anonymouse from Rantsfrommommyland)
10. My husband asked what we got in the mail one day last week. I said we got advertisements for fireworks and Venus razors. My 4-yr-old heard my reply and asked: “what is a penis laser?” We were laughing so hard we couldn’t even answer her. I still have the advertisement on my kitchen counter because I laugh every time I look at it. (Kerri from Rantsfrommommyland)
