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Parenting

17th May 2019

Mum heartbroken after husband asks why ‘she doesn’t love him enough’ to lose baby weight

Keeley Ryan

A mum was left fuming after her partner asked her why she “doesn’t love him enough” to lose her baby weight – two months after she gave birth.

The woman explained on Mumsnet that she and her husband had been dating “on-and-off” for five years, before getting married around. year ago. They welcomed their son, their first child together. two months ago.

She said that she had gained 3.6 stone during her pregnancy, but had since lost 2 stone.

The mum wrote:

“I wasnt very thin before but I looked ok, or so I thought. Before we were married I would often see on his phone he would Google pics of skinny women, lots of them…he enjoyed chatting to them too..but that was very long ago, before we were serious.

“But something told me to check his phone. A week after baby was born. Bam. Every single days. Pages and pages of facebook pics of skinny girls from the gym. Even some of the ones from his past. Broke my heart but I said nothing, for the sake of baby.”

She went on to recall how when she looked at his phone, she saw a chat from a girl at the gym. She was devastated after she saw her husband was “commenting on how nice her arms are and flirting with her”.

She explained:

“He knew I looked at the phone. He demanded I admit I snooped and broke his trust. I didn’t say anything, that’s when he said the weight comment..

“He said ‘I have a question. You lost all the fat and weight in the past for your ex. Why dont you love me enough to do it for me?’

“I was in shock and could not believe what I heard.

“In the past I had lost a lot of weight before I dated him, but that was early twenties and I ate nothing and was miserable all the time…that’s not a fair comparison.

“I was in tears and told him that’s not fair. And he said it again. Why don’t I love him enough to lose the weight I gained.

“Its been a terrible night. I’ve been crying and he doesnt care. Said if we didnt have a child he would be sleeping at a hotel.”

The mum said that she was “broken” by her husband’s comment, adding: “I truly believed I married someone who loved me for me, not how I look.”

The other Mumsnet users were absolutely horrified by what her husband had said to her.

Someone commented:

“I bet you could lose 80Kg of unwanted flesh by tossing him out the window.”

Another parent added:

“What a disgusting way to treat you. You must be feeling so vulnerable OP. Your weight is none of his concern and to be frank, he sounds like a complete pig.

“You need to be tough and tell him his behaviour on this isn’t good enough. Your body grew and birthed a bloody human! He should be treating you like a goddess.”

A different person wrote:
“You deserve so much better than that disgusting excuse for a man. You have literally carried and birthed his child, does he not understand that women’s bodies change when they have babies?”