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Parenting

22nd Jun 2018

Mum slammed for ‘inappropriate’ stranger danger warning to son

Her words were also called "over the top".

Keeley Ryan

However, she doesn’t seen the problem.

A mum has been told off after she gave an “inappropriate” stranger danger warning to her eight-year-old son.

The anonymous woman explained that one of her friends was over as she was getting ready to send her son to his first sleep-over.

Her post on BabyCentre began:

“It’s a hockey camp near me where they’re having a night of special guest talks and lots of camping fun.

“There’s going to be a few people we don’t personally know around and I’ve always been open with my kids about safety and trusting their gut instinct.

“I was standing with my friend in the dining room and kissing my son goodbye (my husband was leaving to drop him off) and I said to him ‘now, you’re going to be staying overnight and there will be lots of people you don’t know around.

“‘Make sure you trust your gut and if anyone makes you feel uncomfortable, touches your privates, does anything inappropriate, speaks inappropriately, makes you touch them or do anything inappropriate to them then you must stand your ground, say no, get away and call me right away.’

“He said okay, hugged me and headed out the door.”

She said that her friend was “gobsmacked” by her warning, calling it “age-inappropriate”.

She also recalled how her friend said, “I shouldn’t say things like that because then he will fear strangers.”

The mum continued:

“Personally, I don’t see any problems with it. We have discussed that not all strangers are dangerous but that we all need to make sure we are aware and prepared.

“He didn’t seem phased at all by what I said either. My mum used to say similar to me too, so I guess it’s a normal discourse for me.

“Should I have worded it differently? Was I too blunt or graphic? Was it inappropriate?”

The general consensus was that while it was a good idea to have a conversation about boundaries and personal safety, the mum’s warning was “inappropriate” and “over the top”.

One parent wrote:

“Up to you, but if I’d overheard you I would have thought ‘whoa’ too.

“But also good for you for having it covered.”

A different mum added:

“Woah that’s really OTT [over the top].

“It’s also offensive to the people running the camp that you’re opening saying you think it’s a possibility that it’ll happen to him so you feel the need to say it.”

Another pointed out:

“I think having a conversation about boundaries and personal safety etc prior to the event is fine but I personally feel that reeling of a list of potential threats is a bit OTT.”

The mum later added that she had never used that exact warning before, as her son had never slept away from home before.

She continued:

“Yeah, I can see that. I guess I’ll speak to him in the morning (it’s late here) and ask him if he felt worried or if it made him feel uncomfortable while at camp.

“He honestly didn’t seem the slightest bit phased, but he’s a kid so I guess it’s impossible to know unless asked.”