Everyone knows a pushy parent, forcing their child to make up for their own mistakes and failed dreams.
Abraham Lincoln once said what every mum who’s ever forced tennis, piano, or violin lessons on their child secretly wants to hear,
“All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my mother.”
There comes a time in every mother’s life when you must admit that you’re not just “an involved parent” but are, in fact, living vicariously through your children…
1. When I became a GA-MA
I never thought I’d turn into a fully fledged fold-out-chair-carrying GA-MA who hoards hang sangiches and bottles of water in the boot of a people carrier. It just kind of happened. Last year, I made a box frame for their medals and displayed them as proudly as if I’d scored every medal-winning point myself. Shameless. I finally knew my enthusiasm had gone too far when someone asked me how old my son was and I answered “under eights.”
2. When I decided (at least one of) my kids will be in an orchestra
Lookit, I’ve been there. I suffered my way through years of piano lessons as a child and rolled my eyes at the “you’ll regret giving it up when you’re older.” Well, guess what… Oh ok fine, I regret giving it up. Which is precisely why my children will just have to endure the same sheet reading torture and practice that I did. We won’t have any of that musical regret when they’re playing the National Concert Hall and I’m in the front row, clapping in a completely non-pushy smug manner.
3. The ballet dream
Having a girl after two boys, the force was strong with this vicarious dream. It was ALL the things; pink everywhere, special shoes, elegance, soft tinkly music. Sigh. Her Ladyship was having none of it. After just two classes she threw a hissy fit when I told her no she couldn’t wear her jeans and patent black boots to ballet. After a single term of bribery and cajoling, my proxy dance mom career had ended. I’m still not over it to be honest. Actually, can we just talk about something else?
4. When I started dropping inspirational quotes into ‘pep talks’ with my kids
I’ll admit that the day I whisper-shouted “winners never quit and quitters never win” through a wire fence I officially crossed the line into creepy.
Have you ever fallen into the pushy parent trap? Let us know in the Facebook comments or join the conversation on Twitter @HerFamilydotie
