Woman starts debate after asking why her rich parents won't help her buy a home
She got some pretty mixed responses.
A woman sparked a huge online debate after asking for advice when her rich parents wouldn't help her buy a home.
The Mumsnet user fumed that her parents - who, she says, are splashing the cash on themselves while she and her parents are struggling.
She explained that her parents are "quite wealthy", have a large portage-free home and take a number of fancy holidays a year.
And when they recently came into "a large sum of money", the pair decided to spend it on themselves and redecorate their home instead of using it to help their daughters.
"My parents are quite wealthy; they have a large house with no mortgage, fancy holidays a few times a year, spend loads on clothes and meals and cars and socialising. My dad works but Mother doesn't.
"Recently they came into a large sum of money and are busy spending it on new furniture, redecorating, cars etc.
"I have two sisters and we are all in our twenties. Our parents have never given any of us any money. I bought a house two years ago and saved for years, my parents contributed by buying me a kettle.
"I'm currently trying to sell the house and I'm going to be few thousand short for a deposit on new house. I'm struggling hard to save this and my parents know. In the meantime they've just bought another new car and are going abroad next week. They always expect expensive gifts at Christmas etc.
"AIBU to be starting to resent them for this?"
The overall response from the commenters was pretty mixed. Some people thought that the parents should lend their daughter a hand, while others thought she should just move on.
One commenter said that she shouldn't have gone "for a house you don't have the funds to afford", and the woman was quick to reply.
“I'm short because of the deposit because of an unexpected cost to selling my house (management exit fee around £1500). I'm not 'going for a house I can't afford'.”
Others felt that the daughter was ultimately being unreasonable in her request.
One person wrote:
“Did you actually try asking them for help? It sounds like you just expect them to offer it if you whine enough, which is a pretty immature way to look at things.”
Someone else commented:
"Yes YABU. As per your own thread title, it is your 'parents money'
"They presumably worked hard to earn the money, pay their bills and raise a family.
"Now they get to damn well enjoy it."
It wasn't until one commenter asked the woman if she had actually approached her parents about the idea of a loan that the tide began to turn.
“Yes I've asked them but they think I have loads of money 'squirrelled away' as I was always good at saving.”
The Mumsnet commenters then took the side of the original poster, and began to remark on the "selfishness" of the parents.
A person commented:
“I find it astonishing that parents don’t help their children out when they have the means to do so. I would give my children a deposit in a heartbeat, if I was able to.”
Someone else bluntly added:
“Your parents are silly.”
Another person wrote:
“I think it's awful that parents don't help for big ticket items like house deposits. Fair enough if you ask for money to go to Las Vegas or somewhere and they refuse but for parents not to acknowledge that their kids may need a bit of a helping hand to get onto the property ladder in today's market just smacks of 'i'm alright jack attitude'.”