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Pregnancy

17th Dec 2019

Mums-to-be are ditching baby showers for ‘mother blessings’

Melissa Carton

Have you heard of this new trend?

While popular in America for decades, baby showers have only really taken off in Ireland and the UK over the last ten years.

When I had a baby shower back in 2012, no one in my family really knew what to expect as it was the first one that they had ever attended. Now, baby showers are a common tradition in Ireland, with most Irish mums-to-be following the ritual.

Although you know what they say, in one day and out the next – because now it seems that baby showers are no longer the done thing and ‘mother blessings’ are all the rage.

While baby showers are generally focused on gifts for the babies, the old tradition of mother blessings dates back hundreds of years and is mostly focused on the mother-to-be herself.

Friends and family gather to bestow their blessings and knowledge on the expectant mum, with some even decorating their bumps with elaborate art during the celebration.

One mum who took part in a mother blessing said that it was an incredible experience:

“It felt empowering. It was more of a celebration than a baby shower. Getting together and supporting each other feels like a feminist thing to do. It was a good build-up to the birth.”

 

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Last weekend these gorgeous women surprised me with a very special #MotherBlessing ceremony. They surrounded me with wishes of strength, love, passion, trust and surrender moving into this next journey of motherhood. . Giving birth in a new country, without the comfort of extended family can seem daunting, but I’ll carry the support and words of encouragement from these wise women with me into my next chapter. . Major thank you to @antheastanley & @bellaeva for creating such a special gathering and to @889community for being my forever yoga home away from home. Baby & I already feel so grateful for the love, thank you. ✨????‍♀️? . . . #MotherhoodUnplugged #BabyBlessing #VaginaTalk #Sisterhood #WomensCircle #PregnancyYoga #BirthWithoutFear #Yoga #Meditation #Love

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While many doulas and birth coaches welcome the new interest in mother blessings, others think the tradition which is said to have originated from the Native American Navajo people is cultural appropriation.

Saying that (and coming from a family with Native American heritage) I think if the mother blessings being practised are simply a gathering of women supporting the mother-to-be that’s fine – as that’s something most of us do with our pregnant friends anyway.

If other aspects of Native American culture, such as traditional regalia or headdresses, were being used then it would definitely fall under appropriation. As far as I can see from the ones I’ve come across, it’s just about creating a support system for the mum.

Blessing traditions, similar to traditional blessings that were bestowed on newlyweds, are something that were fairly common in many ancient cultures. I would like to see baby showers going back to helping the mum-to-be find her feet in new motherhood.