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Relationships

10th Feb 2023

Mum who helped deliver best friend’s baby finds out her husband is the dad

HerFamily

She let the friend and baby stay at her home despite the betrayal.

A woman who helped deliver her best friend’s baby found out days later that her own husband was the father of the child.

28-year-old Hailey Custer, from Arizona in the US, was the birthing partner of her best friend in place of a second parent – even wearing the hospital’s ‘daddy wrist band’.

All the while she had no idea her husband of six years had cheated on her with the woman she was there to support ‘every step of the way’ throughout birth whilst believing the baby’s father didn’t want to be involved.

The mother-of-four discovered the betrayal when she realised a birth defect on the baby’s neck was identical to one her husband has.

“I heard rumours that my friend was pregnant and homeless, so I reached out to her,” Hailey told the Daily Mail. “I felt the need to help her.”

She said she didn’t suspect anything throughout the pregnancy or labour process despite her husband and pal being friendly.

@haileymae93 It makes you stronger for sure. #wedrecover #abusesurvivor #sobrietytok ♬ original sound – aylingonzalez55

“We are all charismatic people, so we all had that nature to be charismatic around each other and make jokes,” she continued. “I didn’t see anything there. I was very naïve so I just didn’t think it would be possible for someone to do that.

“We had just got home from the hospital and I was changing the baby when she turned her neck the birth defect popped out. When they’re babies it is really hard to see, and I wasn’t looking for it.

“I felt it and was like ‘okay’, this shock came over me. When I found out my friend was standing next to me, I looked at her and you could just tell. She couldn’t say anything, she just dropped her head and looked to the floor, and I just knew. There were no words that were said, I just knew.

Hailey says she experienced what felt like the stages of “grief” as “you have your shock, your anger and you come to the conclusion that this is actually real life, this is actually happening.”

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Despite the hurt and betrayal ending her marriage, Hailey said she continued to allow her friend and the baby to stay at her home.

“I kept thinking of my kids,” she explained. “At the end of the day that is their blood sibling and I’m not going to be the one who causes harm to that child. So, she ended up staying with us.”

The pair are still friends as Hailey found forgiveness. She also plans on maintaining a cordial relationship with her ex-husband, who she claims to have cheated on her with up to 30 women throughout the course of their marriage, for the sake of their shared children.

“When you don’t forgive, it’s like you drinking poison and wanting them to die,” Hailey said. “When I forgive for myself, it means I’m forgiving because I can’t stay sick anymore.”