It's official: Nobody in Ireland is calling their baby Karen anymore
After all, it's embarrassing when your baby keeps asking to speak to the manager at Smyths.
I jest, of course. Karen is a perfectly beautiful name. This journalist has many Karens in her life and they're all fabulous.
I also have a beloved Aisling; another name that's been through the ringer thanks to the internet and two savvy Irish writers...
I feel like I'm in no position to mock, even if I wanted to. Surely Laura is the most 'white girl' name of all time? It's ripe for a cancellation at some point, following swiftly in the footsteps of Linda and Sharon.
A Laura sounds like she doesn't believe in God but Christens her kids anyway for the day out. She gets burgundy nails in winter, sparkly red at Christmas and neons for summer. She deffo drives a Qashqai.
But I digress — let's get back to the soon-to-be extinct Karen. It's official, the name has been cancelled. We've done our research and literally nobody is calling their baby Karen anymore; at least not in Ireland.
According to the CSO, 'less than three' babies were registered as Karen last year. That's the lowest number possible, as the system doesn't provide stats less than three. It could have been two, or one, but there's a good chance it was zero.
Do you know a brand new baby Karen? If so, they might be the only one.
There's a lot to be said for having a name that's not super popular. I grew up having four Lauras in my primary school class. And there seems to be another Laura wherever I work. I wouldn't mind this, apart from the fact that I'm relatively tall which means I usually end up being referred to as 'Big Laura'.
Even in our small HerFamily team, there's two of us. Yep, an editorial team of four is half Laura.
So go forth and name your babies Karen, safe in the knowledge that they will be unique and won't suffer as I did. If you have a boy, even better.
Karen for everyone!