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10th Sep 2017

This Irish city has been ranked ‘the least sexual city in the world’

The capital didn't impress either.

Rory Cashin

A Luas-style light rail system could soon be in the pipeline for Cork

Oh dear, this is kind of embarrassing, isn’t it?

Sex-positive app Lazevva surveyed people all around the world, and the results are in, and it doesn’t look good for Ireland.

The survey asked people who lived there to rank the city out of ten in the following areas: Sexually Active, Sexual Experimentation, Sexually Satisfied, Sex Toy Consumption, Porn Consumption, Adult Entertainment, Swinger Score, Access To Contraception, LGBT Friendliness and Gender Equality.

By these criteria, out of the 100 cities ranked, Dublin came in 61st, and Cork came in DEAD LAST. Literally, the least sexual city in the entire world.

The ten most sexual cities in the world are as follows:

  1. Paris – France
  2. Rio De Janerio – Brazil
  3. London – England
  4. Los Angeles – USA
  5. Berlin – Germany
  6. New York – USA
  7. Sao Paulo – Brazil
  8. Las Vegas – USA
  9. Ibiza – Spain
  10. Amsterdam – Netherlands

A firm round of applause for both the USA and Brazil with their positioning… heh heh…

Meanwhile, taking up the bottom of the list, here are the ten least sexual cities in the world:

  1. Cork – Ireland
  2. Bratislava – Slovakia
  3. Belgrade – Serbia
  4. Graz – Austria
  5. Linz – Austria
  6. Salzberg – Austria
  7. Toyko – Japan
  8. Milan – Italy
  9. Hannover – Germany
  10. Chennai – India

That isn’t a great showing for Austria, is it?

But even landed in 4th, 5th and 6th least sexual cities in the world doesn’t quite equal to being home to… and we really can’t stress this enough… LITERALLY THE LEAST SEXUAL CITY ON THE ENTIRE PLANET.

Maybe it has something to do with our porn tastes? According to the same survey, the most searched for porn word is “Lesbian”, which just isn’t trying very hard at all, is it?

What do you reckon, Corkonians? Is this ranking too harsh? Is the world just unaware of your inherent sexy sexiness? It is up to YOU to prove them wrong, and to at least climb above the inexplicable triangle of unsexiness happening in Austria. Do it for your country, Cork!