Mum surprised at sister-in-law’s ‘cheeky’ request for niece’s birthday

She "couldn't believe how cheeky she was".

A Mumsnet user said she was "taken aback" after being asked how much she would be spending on her niece's birthday gifts so she could be sent a list of presents. The woman explained that she had just celebrated another niece's birthday, where she went all out on a "lovely selection of gifts which were well thought out and that I think she would like." But the anonymous woman's second sister-in-law quickly approached her after seeing pictures from the birthday party - reminding her about her other 2-year-old niece's birthday next month. The sister-in-law wanted to know how much she would be spending on gifts so that "she could organise what to pick out of her list from me that covered how much I would be spending." The woman added:

"I was abit taken back we have very minimal contact, they don't ask about the kids and have very little interaction with us. "All our children,  they have all had tenner in the birthday card, which is fair enough."

The Mumsnet user said she didn't reply to her sister-in-law because she "couldn't believe how cheeky she was". She added:

"Personally the point on getting a child a birthday present is to pick something out you would think they would like. "If I didn't want to then I would ask what they would like. "I received another message from [my] brother today again asking how much I was spending on [my] nice and they will send me a list. "I told him I like to pick out what I get people for their birthdays and he's told me not to bother."

And while some fellow commenters pointed out there was nothing wrong with a list, many took issue with the fact that the woman's brother and sister-in-law were insisting the list be used. One person wrote:

"Nothing wrong with a list for several reasons. Stops repeat presents, ensures the gift is wanted and will be appreciated.... "Insisting that everyone sticks to the list is rude however, people should be free to pick and choose."

Another said:

"I'm in the 'fine to offer suggestions IF asked' camp. Sending a list uninvited is just rude."

A different person added:

"Telling someone they must disclose their spending limit so you can furnish them with details of what they are buying is cheeky beyond belief! "And at 2 the kid will probably want to play with the wrapping paper so £10 is a card that can go in the bank is probably significantly more sensible!"

Someone else simply wrote:

"I really can't abide grabby people, it pushes my buttons. "Tell them you're sticking a tenner in a card and be done with it."

But some people understood where the woman's brother and sister-in-law were coming from. One person commented:

"It's probably so she doesn't get a bunch of cr*p that she doesn't want or so that she doesn't end up with 5 different ride on toys that she doesn't have room for. "Calm down. It's only a list."