“A second can change so much”
Saoirse Ruane’s mum has spoken out about her daughter’s anxiety.
In a moving Instagram post, Roseanne wrote about how tough things are for Saoirse when she has medical appointments.
Her mum explained that a recent visit to her GP resulted in a trip to the hospital.
“This is life for Saoírse now & what nobody else sees is the upset and worry it brings. Once Saoírse hears the word GP she flinches.”
Saoirse’s mum said she is “filled with terror and anxiety” whenever she has a medical appointment.
“One second everything could be fine but in that other second “everything can change” right before our eyes.”
She said whenever she has to get an X-ray she gets incredibly upset.
“An X-ray is what lead us to find her last tumour. But Saoírse also knows that this X-ray could lead to a CT scan & that the CT scan can lead to much much more so there were lots of tears today.”
Her mum comforted and reassured her daughter, but said “I don’t know anything for sure”.
“One second everything could be fine but in that other second “everything can change” right before our eyes. We know from previous experience that a CT scan can lead to that conversation none of us want to have with a consultant.”
Roseanne said finding out Saoirse’s cancer was back was like “a bolt that shoots right through you”.
“A punch in the stomach, it brings you to your knees with shock and leaves the fear of God in you going into every appointment going forward. It’s a constant.”
“This is life for us now. This is why we live with permanent fear, anxiety, and stress. We spend hours and days worrying, and sometimes sleep doesn’t come well and nobody can ever take any of this away.”
Saoirse’s family said they try their best to be positive about childhood cancer, but they “also have to be real”
Luckily, everything is okay and Saoirse is back home again.
“We try our best to be grateful,” her mum added.
