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06th Apr 2024

‘My ex-husband is demanding I return to my maiden name because his new partner is jealous’


Her ex-husband’s new fiancée isn’t having it

A 39-year-old woman has entered a feud with her ex-husband after he asked her to change her surname back to her maiden name due to his new fiancée being jealous.

She explained that her ex, aged 38, had met someone new, and that they were getting married. However, he has demanded that the mother of his children change her name back from his, despite it being the same name as her kids.

“My ex-husband has been dating this women for three years. For context, she is 24 years old. My ex and I were married for 12 years, and have been divorced for five years, we have three kids together who are now teenagers,” the woman wrote on Reddit.

“My ex and I got divorced because we were young when we met and got married and we grew apart as people. 

“It was a mutual decision, and we agreed our kids came first and have always co-parented very well. This has been the case up until the last year when his girlfriend moved in with him. 

“Previously we would do holidays and kids birthdays together, now when she is present they won’t even sit near me at our kids’ sporting events. I have always been nice to this woman, despite my kids expressing they do not like her and they feel their dad acts differently when she is around.”

The OP went on to explain that when her ex-husband proposed to his new lover, one of the demands of his new fiancée was that his ex-wife change her surname.

“My ex called me yesterday saying he is giving me a heads up that I have a year to change my last name back to my maiden name as his fiancée is expressing her distaste and concern for her and I to have the same last name when they get married,” she wrote.

“I told him we agreed in our divorce that I could keep his last name until I felt the need to change it, and that is what is listed in our paperwork. I also told him I don’t want to have a different last name than our kids. 

“He said I’m being unreasonable and refusing to see how this would make his finance uncomfortable. I told him I can’t see it from her side because I am a grown up, and not an immature child like she is. He told me I could ask anyone about this situation, and everyone would agree with her.”

She then went on to ask Redditors whether she was being unreasonable, and the vast majority of people thought she was in the right.

“Tell him you’ll only consider changing your last name back to your maiden name if you can change the kids last names also,” one person responded.

A second put: “It’s not his name anymore; it’s your name. If his fiancé doesn’t want to have the same last name as you, that’s fine. She doesn’t have to take his name. Or they can change both of their names to Mr. and Mrs. Big Crybaby.”