Anger ensues as this ‘etiquette expert’ tells parents how to parent

Advice from etiquette expert and social commentator William Hanson will either have you laughing out loud (in disbelief) or clenching your fists with rage.

Mr Hanson wrote a very intriguing article, contributing to the MailOnline and many clearly think it's outrageous.

My new column tells you how to raise your children properly. @MailOnline https://t.co/mj57pRSWiu

— William Hanson (@williamhanson) July 7, 2017

Mr Hanson provided a step by step guide on how to raise your children like the upper class… and it’s just so old-school. Yes, it’s ridiculous, this we know for sure. But that’s what allows one to be oh so amused at the same time. To begin, the master in etiquette takes to advising us to get a nanny - for all your duties overseas (as if you are royalty) and well, every moment here at home. Sure, why bother taking care of the little ones when someone else can? No, it’s not because you’re bringing home the bacon. It’s simply because you’re so stinking rich, that the option is attainable, so TAKE advantage.

A post shared by William Hanson (@williamrhhanson) on Oct 27, 2015 at 10:42pm PDT

What must baby call the two people that made them? Mummy and Daddy. Never ever Mum and Dad as clearly the shortening of the noun screams a shortening of cash. But Hanson does say as “upper boys” get “hormonal,” using the term Dad will suffice. Thank God we asked.

@williamhanson I'm really hoping you're whole persona is satire. Your parenting tips were shameful.

— Mrs P (@JustMrsP) July 7, 2017

Ok, this next one is controversial. Although opinions on the subject differ, we’re all about feeding your baby wherever we’re comfortable doing so, whether that means in public or otherwise. Mr Hanson does not agree. With regards to breastfeeding, he says, “…good manners generally state that anything that does unnerve or upset people should be avoided. Mothers – don’t be too prissy here.” Blood BOILING.

Apparently it's rude to breastfeed in public when you're posh. I guess they're banished to the loos then? #classyhttps://t.co/Dvrfsi3bfR

— The Mummy Bubble (@TheMummyBubble) July 7, 2017

Hanson states that "upper-class folk" would never dream of having a baby shower saying they are “terrible and ghastly.” Clearly not one for the craic is he? What’s worse, however, is finding oneself in a “function room” if the horrid event took place outside the home. He also refers to a dummy as a “plastic muzzle” which we would never ever see the upper-class children sporting. Having a temper tantrum in public is a big ‘no no,’ and if, god forbid, the child acts like a child and makes a scene, Hanson advises us to “leave immediately” so as not to subject anyone else to our own dilemmas. Ok, this guy is living on another planet.

Well that article is going to go down well......

— Helen (@helyshelly) July 7, 2017

He also spoke about how important it is to have the kids socialising with the “right sort of people.” Clearly, this must mean a super expensive playschool – as if putting a roof over their heads isn't costly enough. By age four, our babies should be highly proficient in manners he says. Hanson writes that if children this age aren’t writing thank you letters and well able to speak to adults, this is a sign of a sheltered and “overprotective upbringing.” As if there's no such thing as a naturally shy child who needs some extra time to flourish. Oh. My. God.

How many Children do you have?

— chris smith (@cjpartsuk) July 7, 2017

It's clear why so many are outraged and disgusted that someone who's stuck in such a time warp could even be given a platform to tell parents how to parent. But being sure not to forget our manners we say thank you for your input Mr Hanson, but there seems to be a rather thin line here between ‘etiquette’ and ridiculous customs that serve their place only in the history books. Good day sir.