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Parenting

17th Apr 2017

Irish mums and dads abroad: motherhood In Melbourne

Alison Bough

In 2011, recruitment specialist Deirdre O’Neill and her husband Owen left Ireland seeking work in Melbourne, Australia. They now have two children, Harry (4) and Lottie (10 months), and became permanent residents of Oz in 2013.

Irish Mums Abroad

Myself and Owen met in our early thirties. I’m originally from Kilcock in Kildare and he’s from Drumlargan in Meath. The work situation at home wasn’t great and it gave us the nudge to make the move. Owen’s sister was already living in Melbourne so we decided to ‘try it out for a year and see what happens’. I got sponsorship through my work as a recruiter and we came out here on a ‘457’ visa. Now we live in Carrum, a suburb South East of Melbourne.

I’ve always loved Australia, I did the working holiday here in 1999 and always had an itch to get back. It was daunting of course, coming back as a ‘grown up’ to work and live. The Aussies are fantastic people and they love the Irish here so it was easy to settle in. Everyone was friendly and helpful. My employers were very welcoming – they even sent me a welcome basket on arrival. Back home I wouldn’t have said we had a good work/life balance but I feel I definitely have that here and it’s something that Australian employers encourage. Having that support makes being here with no family network a bit easier.

We disagree about the food…I’m such a basic and boring eater…I miss my ‘Irish Chinese curry’ and my proper Hellmann’s mayonnaise. You also can’t get a decent crisp as far as I’m concerned! But Owen loves trying new things and Melbourne is every foodie’s dream.

It’s not cheap to live in Melbourne. You do get the salary to reflect the cost of living but I think you have to be very smart with your money. It takes a while to get familiar with the more economical ways of doing things. Rent is high if you want to live in a nice suburb close to the city and you pay council rates, water rates, all of that. But if you are smart with your money you can do very well.

Both of our children were born here – our son Harry was born in 2012 and our daughter Lottie was born in June last year. Childcare is very expensive – daycare is around $120 a day. You get a 50% rebate from government on that but it’s capped at $7500 per year, per child. So if you have a child in daycare full-time you’d only get about five months out of that. We’ve been lucky – we had an amazing Irish childminder for Harry until he was almost two. Then we moved suburbs and we had an Au Pair for six months, then we used daycare for six months. Now we’ve got Lottie we will do the Au Pair thing all year round as there’s no point in me working for all my salary to go on daycare fees. Employers here also give you ten ‘carer days’ per annum. These are paid days you can take to stay home with your sick child or any other carer duties. Both of us get them so it’s reassuring to know we won’t suffer financially when you get that call from daycare. I get to work from home one day a week too so that definitely helps.

I can’t speak highly enough of the public health system here. It would actually be a huge reason for us to stay. Our son has had different procedures done, I’ve given birth here twice, we’ve been to emergency a few times. I’ve never had anything but positive experiences.  It’s called Medicare and everyone pays 2.5% of their salary in Medicare tax – it’s the best. I read the stories of what’s happening at home with the HSE and it just makes my blood boil!

Harry is four so he’s in Kindergarten. My friends with kids in primary school are very happy with the education here. You get endless support from the teachers and programmes they have. They also provide counselling services to kids who need it and a lot of other assistance. Right now I’m still of the mindset that no country beats the education that you get in Ireland but maybe I’ll think differently when the kids are in big school.

Melbourne is so vibrant and beautiful with beautiful people. Obviously the good weather is a huge bonus…mind you, summer is taking its time arriving right now…I love the beach and pool life in the summer. I also love the multiculturalism – the friends we’ve made from Ireland, Australia, South Africa and the UK. I’m very lucky that I actually have my best friend from home living here with her family. In the summer we love to go to the beach or a local outdoor pool and spend the morning there. We eat out a lot too and there’s loads of family friendly places that have play areas for the kids. There are fantastic parks here with playgrounds and barbecues…an evening barbie at the beach is lovely. During the winter months we tend to go to indoor pools or play centres.

I went home for seven weeks in February but before that it had been almost three years since I had seen my family. The fact that you can’t just jump on a plane and pop home for a weekend is hard. Nothing beats Ireland on a beautiful sunny day – I just wish there were more of them. Sometimes it makes me sad to think that if we were back home the kids would be growing up with all their little cousins and probably having a ball with them. But we plan on getting home at least every two years from now on so there’ll be lots of memories for them of spending time together.

We got our Permanent Residency in 2013. Will we ever go back home? That’s the million dollar question! Right now, our lives are here. We see a future here.

Are you thinking about emigrating with your family? Email [email protected] or let us know your thoughts in the Facebook comments.