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Parenting

30th May 2016

Mums Abroad: Tara O’Connor on Bringing Up Babies In London

Sive O'Brien

Tara O’Connor is a PR guru and mama to two gorgeous little boys, JP (4) and Andrew (2). Formerly based in Kildare, she now lives with her husband and sons in bustling London. 

“We moved to London because of my husband’s work. Although for us as a family the move has been successful, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do: leave my house and family in Ireland, pack everything into a truck, move from countryside to a city and set up a new life.  All this with two small kids and a dog. I will confess I brought far too much. Space in London houses is at a premium so why I brought a 16 piece china dining set with me I do not know.

I work for myself in PR & Events. I chose my clients Stella & Dot and Glossybox based on their flexibility to work with me as a mom. I like to be with the boys as much as I can and to do all the school drop-offs and pick-ups where I can.

We live in West London and I love the proximity of everything. It’s great being able to walk to the shops or walk my son to school as in Ireland we live in Kildare so I drive everywhere and I am permanently in the car.

In London you are on your own…. There’s no family support and we no childcare at the beginning, which was really hard.  You can’t just call ’round to your mom to say hi and get some advice. It’s just you and your husband making decisions in a city on your own. JP had just turned three when we moved and he really struggled. He missed his cousins, friends and his old nursery. He still prefers his old room. It broke my heart to see him so upset – he often says he wants to move back to Ireland.

JP was lucky to get into an amazing nursery thanks to my friend Koo and he has come on so much developmentally since he started there.  The three weeks of hearing him cry when I dropped him off at the beginning was worth it to see him flourish so much. Andrew my youngest is starting there after Easter and I am looking forward to seeing him make friends and develop like his brother.

The mums at school and at playgroups are amazing. We have made great friends here and we all treat each other like family. A lot of families from abroad are in London and they have no family support either so we all support each other. My kids have a better social life than me with all their playdates, they’re meeting kids from all over the world. Saying that we are paying a lot for private Montessori, but the kids learns so much at Montessori level over here.

We built a house in the country at home and I miss it terribly. Facetime is great but I miss seeing my nieces, mom and sisters all the time too, as well as our friends. Life in London is fast and sometime impersonal. Everyone is so busy all the time. I guess I got used to country living in Kildare and London is a world away. On Saturday it was my two-year-old’s birthday. Even though we had a party when we were home recently in Dublin we still had nobody to blow out the candles with him as everyone was busy. I was sad not to have his cousins and grandparents around the table. He hadn’t a clue – we hide all our emotions from kids, don’t we?

The best thing about living here is that we have a lot of great family time. At the weekend there is no other distraction but our kids, it’s part of why I moved to London. It is sometimes tiring however, not being able to drop the kids to their grandparents for a few hours so hubby and I can spend some time together without it costing us money. I also love the proximity of everything here. We can walk 10 minutes to Portobello Road or jump on the tube and be on Oxford Street in 15 minutes. London has amazing parks and the kids love them.

If we were to move home I’d miss the school system, the wonderful things to do, from museums to day trips to Lego Land, and the parks especially. The park is part of our everyday routine.”

boys