OK, so summer is on the horizon – and even the most confident of gals will probably still give a little consideration to the likes of wears shorts and strappy tops (or just something that isn’t pajamas).
The problem is – looking after children AND trying to get fit is a serious challenge in itself.
Fear not, fellow mamas! Now that May is here, we’ve come up with five ludicrous ways to start exercising at home…
1) Pick up raisins:
Got your separation-anxiety suffering baby on your hip? SPLENDID, hand him those raisins! Aaaaaaaand here comes the drop! Squat and pick them up. Quick now, you KNOW what happens if you miss one, it will be sitting there for days gathering fuzz until he finds it and eats it. Hand them back to the baby… wait for the drop, squat, pick up, repeat! DO NOT put down that baby. Drop, squat, pick up, repeat! (And be glad he’s not old enough to heckle you).
2) Read them loooong books:
Is it story time already? You know what that means: butt clenches! That’s right, your butt is the biggest mass of muscle in your body, the best thing you can do for your poor aching back is strengthen that butt! So, pick a book that’s long, or something with detailed pictures to linger over, aaaaaaaaand CLENCH! Hold it! Don’t let that teeth-gritting get in the way of your story voice. Smile at that baby. I SAID SMILE! Yes, that IS a duck, quack quack, really FEEL that burn!
3) Just stay at home:
No need for cardio, wear a pedometer some day when you’re home with the baby and you don’t even leave the house. You’d be amazed how far you walk.
4) Nap-time stretches:
Moving on to flexibility; naptime is a great time to work on this. Lie on the bed or sit on the couch, make sure you’re not near ANYTHING entertaining. Let the baby fall asleep. Remember that you didn’t turn off the ringer on the phone. Aaaaaaaand CONTORT! Get that phone. Remember that if your mother calls it will wake the baby! There’s no way you’ll make it through naptime without Facebook! Really reach with that leg, use your toes and remember they are capable of grabbing. Oh you forgot to close the curtains too? Use those feet too!
5) Oh… and Kegels:
Now, for Kegels! ….On second thought, f*** these, everyone hates kegels. *Moving on!
And there you have it, a completely ludicrous full-body workout. While none of these may actually work, and you may feel ridiculous doing them, I promise they will be VERY entertaining for the baby, which is something.
Full disclosure: I have actually done some variation of ALL of these. Especially the butt clenches. I’m doing them right now. You should SEE my face.
*seriously though, do your kegels.
Find Ani on Twitter @AniMSarkisian.
