Confession: My life runs on coffee.
Like, I eat food too (obvs), but really, what keeps me on my feet, on the go, on time for the school run and on the ball in work, it’s all coffee.
For the most part, I feel perfectly fine about this addiction, as I have very few other ones. I don’t smoke, I hardly ever drink anything alcoholic (I feel like having a sneaky cocktail when out on the town a handful of times a year hardly counts) and my cravings for Reeses Peanut Butter Cups every Friday hardly counts as a fully-fledged addiction, surely?
So, see; super virtuous when it comes to everything else. But, guys, coffee…
I love the taste of it and smell of it and the whole ritual surrounding getting my hands on it every day. I love visiting new coffee shops, and, when in college, never once went near the library on campus, but wrote every single one of my papers and assignments in my local Starbucks.
The thing is, I do sometimes wonder if maybe my love of coffee is getting a little out of hand… (and not just when my husband checks our joint account and tries to pin me down for a discussion about the necessity of takeaway lattes when we are in possession of no less than two Nespresso machines…)
Like, is it a bit much when:
1. I am close personal friends with my local baristas
I now get personal messages scribbled on my cup in Starbucks. Seriously. Anything from friendly phrases in Norwegian (my native language) that they have googled (BLESS!) to my all-time favourite one: The first Starbucks latte I picked up after the birth of my little boy has the following written on it: “Welcome to the world, baby Luca!” Needless to say I have kept that one in his baby box!
Oh, and it goes both ways. I recently attended the baby shower of one of my local Starbucks’ baristas… Kid you not.
2. I would actually live without my husband before I tried living without my Nespresso machine
I don’t feel like this all the time, but sometimes… (like every other day…)
3. I dream of a day when Ireland will be filled with drive-through Starbucks outlets
It’s 2017 for crying out loud. How is this still not a reality?! You can get a hamburger and milkshake without leaving your vehicle, but you can’t get your hands on a venti coffee?!
4. Our current account statement reads like a city guide over Dublin’s best coffee shops
Monday: Butler’s, Tuesday: Kaph, Wednesday: Peacock & Green and on and on and on it goes.
5. I look forward to going to bed at night, so I can wake up and have coffee
There is nothing, nothing, like that first sip of my morning take-out latte.
6. I frequently find myself waiting outside coffee shops on a Sunday morning
In my excuse, I have children that are up really (really!) early… Come on, guys, how long can it possibly take to open those shutters?!
7. No matter how late I am running for anything, I seem to always make time to stop and grab a (take-out) coffee
Like; would you rather I am there just physically, or do you actually want my brain for something too?!
8. I’m actually not very nice without coffee
This is a little alarming, isn’t it? Like; how much of my personality is actually directly linked to caffeine?!
9. I have lost the ability to get anything done without coffee
I am a busy working mum-of-two. My days are a whirlwind of deadlines and play dates and lunchboxes and PTA meetings and all sorts of fun things. This is all fine – once I have had coffee. Caffeine turns me into a ball of energy. I write stories, make phone calls, mentally type up to-do lists, you name, it can handle it.
Without coffee, however,, I literally just fell into an abyss of ‘I’ll do it laaaaater’.
10. I value coffee over money (clearly)
A quick calculation on my phone tells me that my coffee habit is costing me somewhere in the €1650-€1800 region every years. Which alarmed me a little straight away. Until I was like; surely the bloody point of making money in the first place is so that you can spend them on enjoyable things?! Like coffee.
