Ashley Cain has opened up on the grief he has experienced since losing his daughter to acute myeloid leukaemia, and how it has made him stronger.
The athlete lost his daughter, Azaylia, at eight months old and now two years later, he has shared that there is not a day that passes that he doesn’t think of her.
He said that he wakes up each morning to a photo of Azaylia, wears a necklace with her handprint and thinks of her with gratitude,
“April usually marks a challenge. This year I’ve cracked 125 miles from Devizes to Westminster. I like to do a challenge that’s going to be really tough round her anniversary, not only to commemorate her life, but to help me release some of the pain from my head and my heart,” he told PA.
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“In the second year the wave of grief was different, but it hurt just as much. I understood that Azaylia wasn’t here anymore, that she was in heaven and I was never going to see her again until the end of my journey.
“But the scary part about that was I’ve started to forget what she smelled like, what she felt like, that feeling of the kiss of her lips. I know every year it’s going to get further away. The grief doesn’t change – it comes in different waves at different times. I don’t believe that the circle of grief gets any smaller. I believe you have to get stronger around it.”
Ashley’s daughter Azaylia passed away two years ago when she was eight months old, after being diagnosed with a form of leukaemia. Since her passing, Ashley has been taking part in a number of physical challenges to raise money for a charity he set up in her name.
Just weeks before her one-year anniversary, Ashley and Safiyya revealed they had decided to break up but said they remain “bonded by our powerful journey together” and “the eternal love we have for our daughter.”
The reality TV star and footballer Ashley first shared the news of his daughter’s leukaemia back in October of 2020, revealing she had a “rare and aggressive form of cancer.”
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