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Parenting

20th May 2019

10 complete NOTIONS I had about being a mum…and then the baby arrived

Trine Jensen-Burke

Oh, hindsight…

It’s such a wonderful thing, isn’t it? And never have I experienced it quite as I have in the years since becoming a mother. Now I frequently laugh out loud at all the (ridiculous) notions about parenting I had before ever squeezing a baby out of my body.

That’s the thing, though, isn’t it? Parenting is the easiest thing in the world to have an opinion on – before you actually find yourself in the trenches of parenthood and everything has changed. How, you say? Well, here are just ten of those brilliant things I was absolutely sure of before my littles came along:

Notion #1:  It has got to be a natural birth

No. No, it doesn’t. As long as your baby comes out safe and sound, that is all that matters. C-section, epidurals, gas, air, hypnobirthing, whatever it takes to get that baby out is fine. Whatever.

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Notion #2: Breastfeeding is easy

Ehm, no. Not for the first few days anyway. Those first few days were a cloud of tears and milk anxiety (when is it coming, am I making enough of it, how often does she need it etc.) and raw and painful nipples (sorry!). The good news is that it did get easier, and I am overjoyed I did it and stuck with it for close to a year. But those first few days? Not easy.

Notion #3: Newborns sleep all day

I know, I know. I don’t know where I picked this one up (Sitcoms? Movies? People who lie?) and I’m sure some infants do sleep all day—but mine slept only when being pushed around the city in her stroller, with the rest of the day a blur of feedings, crying, changings, soothings, crying and more feedings.

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Notion #4: My baby is going to sleep in her own bed

Turns out, we both preferred sleeping next to each other, my baby girl and me.

Notion #5: My baby will only eat homemade, organic baby food

Not only did my little girl not really like all of the delicious, nutritious gloop I cooked up for her, but once you get to that age when they start eating food they randomly find on the floor and lick hand rails on public transport, I think a jar here and there is not the thing that is going to be the end of them…

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Notion #6: Cloth nappies are so much better for the environment and my baby’s little bum

That might be all well and good, but once you have tried to rinse really runny baby poop out of a cloth nappy in the bathroom of a really fancy restaurant, disposable ones are starting to look really good…

Notion #7: My child will not watch TV/tablets

Hahahahahaha…… That’s all I have to say about this one.

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Notion #8: My kids will never wear those horrible cartoon figure clothes

Disclaimer: I am a very fashion conscious mama and spent a great deal of time after both my babies were born returning clothing we had been given as gifts that had Hello Kitty/Disney characters/Spiderman/Minions on them. Now? I still do my uttermost to avoid them, but when your two-year-old cries because he wants to wear his Lightning McQueen pajamas out in public, what can you do? (Seriously, WHAT?!)

Notion #9: I will never bribe my child with food

Uhm… Fast forward a couple of years and I am throwing rice cakes and raisins and Hoola Hoops at my children as we try and make it through the weekly grocery shop without me ending up in a mental asylum.

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Notion #10: It won’t change me

Maybe the biggest notion of them all. Because boy, has it changed me. Being a mum has flipped my world and universe upside down and inside out, it has made me better, kinder, crazier, more patient, more tolerant, more caring and less consumed with stuff that really don’t matter. It has made me who I think I was meant to be all along.

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(Feature image via TheLifeStyled.com)