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Parenting

23rd May 2022

“My 16-year-old daughter asked me to buy her a vibrator. What should I do?”

Trine Jensen-Burke

Vibrator

Yikes – what would YOU do?

Many of us find it tricky – embarrassing even – to talk to our kids about sex and bodies.

Mostly because growing up, this was a subject that to an extent was shrouded in secrecy and shame for so many, with information limited to the sex education you got in school and a couple of super-awkward talks at home from your own parents.

But times are changing  – and not only do we know now the importance of discussing these things with our children and teens, research how that we are indeed slightly more comfortable doing so than what our own parents were with us.

However – discussing the birds and the bees and where babies come frmo is one thing, but how would you react if your teen came home one day and asked you to pop out and buy them a vibrator…?

 

Se dette innlegget på Instagram

 

Et innlegg delt av Mamamia Out Loud (@mamamiaoutloud)

On Australian podcast Mamamia Out Loud, a mother wrote in recently with this dilemma – and upon hearing her story, let’s just say people had a lot of opinions.

The woman confessed to the podcast hosts that her 16-year-old daughter had confessed she really wanted a vibrator and – she was now asking her mum to help her get it.

As teenagers do, the woman’s daughter presented a pretty solid argument. She said if she was in a relationship, she would most likely be having sex. She also said that it’s perfectly acceptable for boys to pleasure themselves and that a lot of girls her age are using these devices.

The mum said she was taking this to the podcast to ask for advice on what to do – and see what other parents would do in her situation.

Now, clearly, this is someone who is a good mother, she was just (understandably) a tad thrown by this request and wanted to do the ‘right’ thing.

Commenting on the post which went out on the podcast’s Instagram page, one follower commented:

“What a testament to your relationship with your daughter. Clearly she feels comfortable to talk this through with you and she obviously has a healthy relationship with her body. Major Momma win!”

Another one said:

“100%. How beautiful she has come to you. Help her learn what she likes before some boy tells her what she should like because of what he has seen in porn. Keep up the good work & communication mumma!”

A third one chimed in:

“I bought my 16 year old daughter a vibrator. My conversation with her was that understanding her own body will help her when she starts a sexual relationship with another person. For my daughter, feeling comfortable with her body and understanding what is pleasurable for her, thru experimenting with a vibrator is safe and natural. Encouraging this experience is a gift that I didn’t have.”

Tell us – what would YOU do in this situation, parents?

Topics:

parenting,teens