In my pre-kiddo days, I used to go out. A lot. Like, I was out more than I was in. The idea of sitting in on a Saturday night, with no place to go, filled me to the pits of my soul with dread.
I distinctly remember one weekend that none of my mates could go out so I just got myself dressed up and headed down to the local pub where I found loads of other people to hang out with instead. I may have been the original person to be diagnosed with Fear Of Missing Out.
Maybe - MAYBE - if I didn't have kids, then age and a busy work life would have slowed me down eventually. But since the kids came along, and especially with the arrival of baby two, I've noticed that my Party Years have now gradually morphed into The Pyjamas And Couch Years.
Here's what I think is going on:
1. I like my house
Ass Monkey Alan and I worked our asses off to buy it last year and so I enjoy being in it, looking at it and pottering around in it. I especially love doing that when the kids are in bed because the floors are actually pretty nice, so it's great to be able to see them for a couple of hours sans toys.
2. I am tired with a capital T
Jacob is a much better sleeper now than he was, and Eva is a gift from the sleeping gods, but I am owed three years of sleep back from when Jacob was a baby. I would be quite content to reclaim that sleep in spa breaks or a week-long kip on a sunny beach but until there comes a time when I can do that, I am taking it now by going to bed ridiculously early midweek. We're talking 9.30pm some nights. Yes, I have turned into an ol' wan.
3. Babysitters are expensive
We definitely have a bit more help in terms of 'free' babysitters now that we live so close to my parents but because they both work and help us a lot midweek, I don't like asking them too much. Babysitters in my area are a tenner an hour and so every hour that you are out of the house, you are panicking 'That's another tenner, that's another tenner - Jesus, we're up to €60 now and we still have to pay for the taxi home!'
Take even just going to a restaurant that is half an hour away:
Taxi fare there and back: approx €30
Dinner & bottle of wine: approx €50
Babysitter for four hours: €40
Total night out: €120.
You couldn't do that every week, could ya?
4. I live in The Shticks
When I still lived in town last year, I could 'nip in' to see a play or a gig, meet a friend for dinner or hang out at an event. Now we are about an hour in and an hour back, depending on the traffic. So if a midweek gig finishes at, say, eleven, I am still looking down the barrel of not getting into bed until 1 am - and that is zero fun if I have to be back up again at 6 am for kids and work.
5. Ass Monkey Alan is a fabulous cook
When I was younger and doing that thing you do of sitting with your mates and discussing what your 'perfect man' would be like; i.e. have a sense of humour, know how to swim etc (that is a DEALBREAKER for a lot of women btw) - my main requirement was that any man I ended up with would have to be able to cook.. because I can, and have burnt soup. Fact. The food he cooks up is way better than some I've tasted in restaurants, so when I have an opportunity to have a gourmet meal in my pjs.. by jobe I take it!
6. I am already out all day
The energy that I used to have for dancing in clubs until 4 am or drinking wine until the sun came up has been transferred to daytime. From the moment I open my eyes, I am operating at high-speed: dealing with everything the kids need, making plans with Alan, sorting out the house, loading kids and bags and buggy into the car, drop-offs and pick-ups, grocery shopping, walking the dog, taking care of appointments, working, connecting with family and friends, trying to slot in a little bit of 'Me Time' in having a bath or just a quiet cuppa or something, making lunches and dinners..
..so when everyone else is out partying at night time, I'm in the recovery position, gearing up to do it all over again the next day ;o)
Do you still get out as much as you used to? Get in touch at Sharyn.Hayden@HerFamily.ie
