Breastfeeding mum pens open letter to mums using formula 4 years ago

Breastfeeding mum pens open letter to mums using formula

We all know that a baby that is fed and happy and healthy is the holy grail, and that we are all entitled to chose what method we would like to use when it comes to feeding our babies.

However, mothers choosing to use formula over breast milk to nourish their infants often admit to feeling like they are being judged for their choice.

But when this breastfeeding mum posted an open letter on her blog yesterday, she claimed it was not to condemn or judge mums who feed by formula, but to highlight how these mums have been failed by formula companies, society and their own medical teams.

Here is what 31 year-old Rebecca Marie from Chicago, who runs eco-lingerie company Piper Marie, had to say:

Pro-breastfeeding moms aren’t against you.  

We DO NOT think you have failed, we think you have been failed. 

We don’t think you didn’t know enough, we think your medical team didn’t know enough. 

We don’t think you gave up, we think society gave up. 

We aren’t anti-formula, we are anti formula companies. 

We are against their false marketing ploys to make woman second guess themselves.

We are opposed to the fact that society has led us to believe our body is just for looking at, not what it was intended to do. 

We are ANGRY that society has taken away our motherhood.  

We are ANGRY that maternity leave is a f’ing joke. 

We hate that we are led to believe we need to do it all to be successful.  

We are ANGRY that society thinks there is something sexual about breastfeeding. 

Angry that we are made to believe the only purpose to our breasts is for our mates. When in fact there are two functions, to attract a mate and to feed the offspring you two make. 

It’s sad that we are taught our bodies will fail us, that we aren’t enough. 

We are upset that we are told formula is equal to breast milk. 

It’s upsetting that woman are told formula is easier then breastfeeding. 

Told that with formula you know how much the baby is eating and you don’t with breast milk.  

It is not all or nothing. 

Old wives tales are NOT facts.  

We are ANGRY if someone took ownership of your body which makes it hard for you to nurse your child. 

We HATE that when we are pro-breastfeeding people think we are against the moms using formula.

We believe in the saying, “Know better, do better.” We want to spread the knowledge. BUST the myths and let everyone know there is support out there. When we say “Well actually…” or “Did you know…” We are NOT trying to put you down or make you feel like you failed. We are trying to help. It is so hard for me when Moms tell me, “Well my doctor said.” and their doctor was wrong. When they say, “I couldn’t produce enough…” when in fact 99% of the time there was another underlying issue that was never addressed.  

I am grateful that we have formula for when it is needed. It does in fact save lives. Sometimes we do need it. Some moms don’t want to breastfed, that’s cool too. But my hope is, for moms who want to breastfeed, that it is the last resort. Those women have the chance to breastfeed for longer. If breastfeeding doesn’t work more mothers have donor milk available to them. Because the truth is that it is what the norm is, it is the healthiest choice for the mother and the child. It does so many amazing things that science can never replace. 

So moms using formula please know we don’t think you are a bad mom. Using formula does NOT make anyone a bad parent. We think we are all doing the best we can with what society has given us. We are not out to get you, we are out to help woman everywhere. To change society’s mindset. Take back our bodies. Please know that when we are working hard to normalize breastfeeding again we are not against you. This isn’t us again you. It is us against the society who has failed us woman. Not just with breastfeeding, not just with motherhood but on so many levels.  

With all my love and support!



What do YOU think? Will this letter be a comfort or insult to women who for whatever reason are choosing to bottle feed their babies? Do you agree with what she is saying, or is she just adding fuel to an already burning fire? Join the conversation with us on Twitter at @HerFamilydotie