Sometimes as a parent, it’s easier to be soft or to turn a blind eye to bad behaviour.
Every day brings a new battle but being too lenient with our children can cause long-term harm, according to one expert.
‘Buddy syndrome’ is rife, says Dr Martin Stephen, principal of the UK’s National Mathematics and Science College.
Parents must set boundaries rather than try to be their child’s friend, he wrote in The Times Education supplement.
They should be able to “dictate unreasonable times for the child to be home by, to limit screen time and to sniff for the cigarette in the bedroom, as well as to hug the child when the longed-for invitation to the party doesn’t come, someone else is given the best role in the school play or the bike falls over with you on it,” he said.
Parents who ‘ferociously defend’ their child regardless of what they’ve done is an ‘unfortunate development’ of the past few years, he said.
Kids who grow up believing that they are never to blame for anything grow up without learning to responsibility for themselves, he added.
“The ‘my child can do no wrong’ parent encourages the child to think what they wish to happen is theirs by right – and that only they have rights.”
“Children sometimes need to fight – and lose – their own battles, hurt us as parents though it may. They need to learn to earn their rewards: to graft for them.”
Would you agree with Dr Stephen? Do you know a parent with ‘buddy syndrome’? Join the conversation in the Facebook comments or on Twitter.
