Expert warns that the way we parent today is harming our children

There are a lot (A LOT) of books and blogs and websites and experts these days to tell us how we should be parenting.

Gina Ford, for instance, has famously driven thousands of mums half demented with her military-style baby routine guidelines, telling us (down to the minute) when to wake, feed and put baby down – no doubt causing sleep-deprived mamas everywhere to panic and fret over missed schedules and babies who (quite naturally) refuse to be trained into her rigid regime. The thing is, these days, you are almost made feel like a bit of a failure if you don't have your baby sleeping in her own cot and through the night by the time they turn six months – or even younger. But now a professor of psychology has come out and warned that, in fact, the way we are parenting today is not only adding a lot of stress to us parents, it is also, and more importantly, harming our children, preventing a healthy development of both their brains and emotions. Professor Darcia Narvaez specializes in moral development in children and how early life experiences can influence brain development, and she recently presented her research at a symposium at the University of Notre Dame. And what she had found, is rather worrying.

"Life outcomes for American youth are worsening, especially in comparison to 50 years ago," says Narvaez explained. "Ill-advised practices and beliefs have become commonplace in our cultures, such as the use of infant formula, the isolation of infants in their own rooms or the belief that responding too quickly to a fussing baby will 'spoil' it."

This new research links certain early, nurturing parenting practices - the kind common in foraging hunter-gatherer societies -- to specific, healthy emotional outcomes in adulthood, and has many experts now rethinking some of our modern, cultural child-rearing 'norms.'

"Breastfeeding infants, responsiveness to crying, almost constant touch and having multiple adult caregivers are some of the nurturing ancestral parenting practices that are shown to positively impact the developing brain, which not only shapes personality but also helps physical health and moral development," says Narvaez.

In fact, studies show that responding to a baby's needs (i.e. not letting a baby "cry it out") has been shown to influence the development of conscience. Positive touch affects stress reactivity, impulse control and empathy, and free play in nature influences social capacities and aggression. Oh, and having a full set of supportive caregivers (beyond mum alone) predicts IQ and ego resilience as well as empathy. According to Narvaez, the US – and many other developed countries – have been on a downward spiral on all of these care characteristics. As in, instead of being held, infants spend much more time in carriers, car seats and strollers than they did in the past. Very few mothers are breastfeeding at all by 12 months, extended families are broken up and free play allowed by parents has decreased dramatically since the 1970s. And what we have seen is a rise in anxiety and depression among all age groups, including young children. We have rising rates of aggressive behaviour and delinquency in young children. As well as this, a decrease in empathy, the backbone of compassionate, moral behaviour, among college students, are shown in research. What remains a little unsure is whether or not these trends can be put down to modern parenting practices alone, or if they are also a result of other forces.The good news is that, according to Narvaez, early deficits can be made up later.

"The right brain, which governs much of our self-regulation, creativity and empathy, can grow throughout life. "The right brain grows through full-body experiences like rough-and-tumble play, dancing or freelance artistic creation. So at any point, a parent can take up a creative activity with a child and they can grow together."