“I want to give a voice to women to share whatever is in their heart. I will not edit their stories. What you read comes directly from the woman in the portrait. These women are strong, amazing, brave and inspirational. Thank you to everyone who gives me the honour of photographing them.”
These are the words of Natalie McCain, the creator of this striking portrait series of mothers nursing their children. McCain, who lives in Florida, is a photographer and mum-of-two who wants to change the culture of misrepresenting women’s bodies in the media.
“I want to help the next generation of women we are raising to have healthy body images. Let’s show them what women look like when they aren’t photoshopped and empower mothers everywhere to wear your postpartum body proudly. Show your children that what size your pants are doesn’t change how much you love yourself.”
The images have garnered the usual juvenile (and largely misspelled) responses in forums online, with many people expressing disgust at the portraits.
“As a man I can only assume the woman who do this get physical pleasure from it as lots of woman struggle with Brest feeding because they or the baby not suited to it.” (sic)
“No other mammal do this, it’s nothing to do with being beneficial for the child. It simply about the mother craving attention.” (sic)
“I for one am glad I can’t remember being breastfed…aren’t you! These poor kids are destined for flashbacks and nightmares. It’s all about the mothers needs and wants.” (sic)
Extended breastfeeding or just breastfeeding depending on which side of the fence you land can usually be relied on to whip up a bit of judgement. McCain’s series shows mothers nursing children up to school-going age which evidently some seem to find in some way excessive or offensive. When it comes to most arguments around these kinds of topics, I find a lot of the loudest shouters are doing an awful lot of their own projecting on the issue. Claiming that mother’s are getting some kind of unnatural kick out of the interaction or are engaged in the breastfeeding as a form of attention seeking are responses that baffle me.
I have written before on the subject of full-term nursing, and I maintain my (borrowed from Amy Poehler) stance “Good for her, not for me”. I honestly don’t think I could’ve managed what these women are doing, many of whom are tandem feeding multiple children. I loved breastfeeding my son once I got into the swing of it (a little mammary comedy for ya there). However, I also found that it really took it out of me so I really respect these women just as I respect all mums.
What I particularly like about McCain’s Honest Body Project is the mothers’ quotes about their nursing experiences:
“I am a full time working mom. It is so hard spending my day away from my babies. I am fortunate that as a teacher, my husband is able to bring my sons to school during my planning/lunch period so I can see them and nurse them. The best part of nursing for me is the reconnection we get when I come home everyday. I spend my evenings snuggling and nursing; daddy makes us dinner so I can spend that time with them. It’s a unique bond that we have and it helps make up for the time spent apart.”
“From the outside breastfeeding a child who isn’t a “baby” anymore may seem strange. But as the mom nursing a child “this long” I can tell you it just feels like another stage of nursing following the one before it. I’ve held this child and nursed her day after day since the day she was born and though over time she has gotten bigger and heavier and nursing has changed she is still my baby girl and it still feels just as right as it did the first time I nursed her.”
“There will be a day when he will no longer choose to nurse and I trust my son enough to tell me when that will be.”
“I never in 1 million years imagine my son would be 3 1/2 years old and still asking for “milks” daily. There are some mornings he wakes me up in a very loud abrupt manner, and the selfish side of me just wants him to leave me alone. But there are more times when he wakes me up in such a sweet loving way, snuggles up next to me, and in the cutest voice ever, tells me he can smell my milk and asks if he can “please pretty pretty pretty pretty please have milks.” He could be in the worst of moods but as soon as I let him enjoy his milks, all is well in his little world and it sets a much more positive tone to his day.”
“When the twins were getting close to 2 years old, I remember baby A nursing with me then all of a sudden he unlatched, babbled something I couldn’t understand to his brother, and then latched back on. Seconds later baby B came over and latched on. I know he must have been telling his brother to come and nurse!”
“My initial goal for nursing was to just get over the first two weeks which I’ve heard is the biggest hurdle and to go from there. As our nursing journey has progressed I then set some milestones like six months and one year. Once my son reached a year it dawned on me… why do I have these “goals” for how long I feed and nourish my child? We are almost three years into this breastfeeding journey. I never once had the thought of “I’m going to stop nursing at such and such age”. Self-weaning is what is working for us. When my son feels he is done is when we are done.”
“I initially planned to breastfeed for a year because that’s just what everyone said. The AAP, many parenting books, family and friends etc. I had no idea how much my mothering would be entwined with breastfeeding, or how important breastfeeding would be to my child at that point. It seemed only natural to continue once we reached the 12 month mark.”
“When I notice my daughter starting to get worked up we practice deep breathing and I offer her some mama’s milk. Together they help her feel a sense of confidence that she can tackle the emotions that she is feeling.”
“Everyone is entitled to do what they feel is best for their family, and this is what works for us. There are countless benefits, physically and mentally for mother and baby. This is something we are both comfortable with, and it doesn’t affect you in any way. Weaning age internationally is far greater than what you experience here in America. It’s taboo to some because it’s not something many are educated on. Breasts were made to nourish children. Plain and simple. Thanks to media and our culture, they have become sexualized. Your hang ups with the sexualization of breasts are less important than my child’s needs and comfort.”
“It can be really hard to imagine nursing anything beyond the age you are nursing, especially when you’re nursing a really dependent newborn. It’s life sustaining at that time! Set little goals. Over time, you may find that it seems to really work for your family. What’s also nice is, just like many other choices, it doesn’t HAVE to be something that is anyone else’s business to even know you’re doing it. Obviously I don’t mind normalizing it, but that doesn’t mean anyone has to feel pressure to join me in that.”
Did you full term breastfeed your children? Send us your stories to sophie.white@herfamily.ie
Comments via the Daily Mail
Images via The Honest Body Project
