3 Things To Consider If You Want To Raise A Happy Little Boy

You’ve taught him to read, dress himself (almost) and operate the toilet seat (kind of) but what are you teaching your son about the world at large and his place in it? While we're all aware of how important it is to cultivate ambition, self-confidence and positive body image in girls, it's easy to assume that the parents of boys have less work to do. The reality, however is that boys are in fact more fragile than girls in many ways. Studies show that boys grapple more with self-esteem issues and emotions. They might balk at their mummy's hugs kisses but they are also more vulnerable to the ill effects of lack of affection (they're just better at masking it). The key, it seems, is to start early in order to normalise healthy discussion and encourage openness from a young age. This builds trust, which will be vital if you'd like your son to be comfortable confiding in you later on. According to US expert According to US expert Rosalind Wiseman, author of Ringleaders & Sidekicks: How to Help your Son Cope with Classroom Politics, Bullying, Girls and Growing Up, behind every boys’ silence or “I’m fine” is a person with deep emotional needs and a person who wants meaningful relationships that he can believe in:

“Parents can support the emotional lives of their sons without making them soft or unable to handle life’s challenges” says Wiseman. “Giving them the skills to be socially competent when they’re in conflict or upset with someone is the way for them to become truly secure men. The boys want and need this support.”

 Here are 3 messages to introduce to your son this week: 1. It’s good to have dreams While girls tend to be encouraged to picture a future where they are a mum or a princess or an astronaut and incorporate these dreams in make-believe play, boys tend to keep these thoughts to themselves for fear they will be made fun of. Make dreams and aspirations a regular part of the conversation, the bigger the better. 2. All feelings deserve to be expressed Boys often internalise their feelings more than girls, which can lead to frustration and angry outbursts later on. Take your foot off the gas when probing your son for information on events or issues and hold your tongue if your impulse is to offer advice or a lecture. He may already know what to do and might simply need a sounding board. 3. Everybody has weak moments Rosalind Wiseman believes the biggest challenge is the relentless pressure to meet the expectations to be a man - to take care of anything that comes one’s way without breaking. Encourage a more accepting atmosphere at home and ensure that any important male role models in your son’s life are on the same page. We think you should get your hands on this … Ringleaders & Sidekicks by Rosalind Wiseman, €21.50, Easons   What do you think mamas? Is raising a boy harder than raising a girl? Do you notice the differences? We would love to hear from you! Tweet us @HerFamilydotie