Mum sparks debate after criticising another parent for not putting their ‘kids first’

Commenters disagreed on who was in the wrong.

A mum sparked an online debate after she said that she told another mum off because she didn't put her "kids first". The woman explained that she was meeting up wth some friends, when one of them claimed she didn't "have any money to buy her kids some new school shoes." But, according to the original poster, the woman had admitted shortly before that one of her family members was on holiday "and was getting her some cigarettes and alcohol" that she was paying for. She wrote on Mumsnet:

"Yesterday I was meeting with some friends one of which I’m not as close with but she always tags along which is fine. "We got onto the subject and she said how she doesn’t have any money to buy her kids some new school shoes. "Before that topic had came up she was saying how a family member was on holiday and was getting her some cigarettes and alcohol and it was really cheap. (She was paying for it) "Usually I bite my tongue but she just pissed me off. I said to her how about maybe she should stop drinking and smoking and buy her kid the new school shoes they need. "She only has 2 kids. She was a bit gobsmacked. Didn’t really say much just made up an excuse and left. "Am I the only one bothered by the fact that people not putting their kids first and complain about the kids not having any nice clothes etc when they spend a majority of their money on stuff they don’t really need. "I don’t drink or smoke and I just about make ends meet, the only time I buy stuff for my self is Christmas and birthday. "All my other spare money gets spent on my fast growing children. "Esp3cially my son who seems to grow inches every day. "I manage to £50 for holiday every month and £50 for Christmas every month. I’m not the only one that feels like this right?"

Plenty of parents were quick to join in on the debate, with many saying that the mum was "rude". One person said:

"Think what you like but you were rude - especially as others were there."

Another added:

"It's none of your business and you were rude. You will have upset her, but that's OK because you get to feel all pleased and righteous with yourself."

But other Mumsnet users agreed with the initial commenter. One person wrote:

 "Urgh, I think I'm in the midst of a sea change on this one. "Normally, I'd be saying that you shouldn't judge but, no, f***it. "If someone is serving their desire for fags and booze before their children's need for shoes and are stupid enough to whine about it in front of others then I think yeah, I'd have struggled not to point that out too."

Someone else said:

"I definitely would have judged her! Cigarettes and alcohol are luxuries and if she can’t afford basics then I don’t think it’s unreasonable to point that out to her."