Mums Abroad: 6 Differences In Bringing Up Kids In Northern England

HerFamily

Sharon Canavan is 25. She is married to Shane (32). They have a 22-month-old son, Fionn, and a 4-week-old son, Daithí. They moved from Dublin to Nuneaton, a lovely little town east of Birmingham and north of Coventry, in 2012.

While the original plan had been to move to the west coast of Australia, circumstances changed and they ended up making a (much) shorter journey across the water just after getting married. With two young children and a house, it looks like they are set to stay.

We asked Sharon about the main differences between raising her expanding brood in Northern England, compared to Ireland. Here is what she said…

1. The Chats

In Ireland, we speak the same language, watch the same TV shows and wear the same clothes as the UK, but the cultural differences between the two countries are amazing. The NHS is one of the biggies but I’ll come to that later. Another is that people don’t talk to each other! This is something I seriously struggled with. I’m used to saying hello to whoever I pass on the street and knowing all of my neighbours (and their kids/grandkids/dogs). That hasn’t been the case here, though. I’ve tried making small talk with other mammies in the playground, or with other women at the gym, but they tend to look at me like I have ten heads. People are very polite but like keeping themselves to themselves. It took us almost a year to learn the names of our neighbours but I think once people realise we’re Irish, they make allowances for our crazy need to talk to people.

2. The Cost of Living

The cost of living is a lot lower here, once I stopped comparing the pound to the euro. We’re earning in pounds and spending in pounds, so I had to stop drawing the irrelevant comparisons. Groceries, dinners out, running a car etc. all take up a small percentage of our weekly budget than they did when we were living in Dublin. Granted Nuneaton isn’t a capital city, but still, we could afford to buy a family home without having to sign our lives away.

3. The Healthcare

The National Health Service goes a long way to helping lower the cost of living, especially with the inevitable/crazy mammy trips to the doctor you tend to make with a toddler. GPs are free, as are prescriptions (including contraceptives). A&E visits, ambulances, specialists, consultants are all free. I felt like I was stealing the first time I left a GP’s practice and chemist without putting my hand in my purse! Out-of-hours appointments are easily available and the maternity care I have received has been faultless. I was able to book midwife appointments on a Sunday and all visits are at the local children’s centre, meaning fewer visits to the hospital. Honestly, it may be an unpopular opinion to read, but I feel a lot safer in the hands of the NHS when it comes to antenatal care. I know my life is the priority and I have the final say over my body.

4. The Attitude Towards Breastfeeding

I’ve found the attitude to breastfeeding refreshing too. I was lucky, especially with my maternity hospital. It has won countrywide awards for their breastfeeding support, but it’s also fantastic in the wider community. There is an initiative called ‘Warwickshire Welcomes Breastfeeding’ and all of the cafes and restaurants around the county have little stickers with the logo in their window. It’s just something small but it has definitely made me and other mothers feel a lot more at ease about feeding in public. Quite a lot of places have quiet corners with comfy chairs if you want more privacy, and every shopping centre/supermarket has a feeding room. I fed Fionn until he was one and I have never received a negative remark. There was also excellent support in the children’s centre. All of the baby groups and clinics have a specialist nurse who is on hand to answer any questions or just to chat about the ups and downs. There seems to be a baby boom in Nuneaton lately, so it’s a common sight to see a group of mammies sitting around a cafe feeding.

5. The Educational Options

Easy access to nonreligious education is something that seriously appealed to us too. We had discussed what we would do about schools if we had had kids in Ireland and had prepared ourselves for a battle to get them into schools without being christened, but luckily that isn’t an issue for us anymore. All school admittance is based on a catchment area, depending on your postcode, and the options of schools range from a number of secular and nonreligious schools to Church of England, multi-denominational, and Catholic schools.

6. The Family

We’ve built a great surrogate Irish family over here. A lot of that came from joining the local(ish) GAA club, Roger Casements, in Coventry. It’s a city with a huge Irish population and they were more than welcoming of new faces. I’ll admit, it’s still tough not having family here, but we Skype with Mam and my sisters every few days. Fionn will carry the laptop to me so he can see them. He’s so used to seeing Granny on the screen that he runs his fingers through her hair when he does see her in person to make sure she’s real. It’s hard for the grandparents missing out on his developments but they’re just relieved we’re only a 40-minute flight away and not half way around the world. All in all, we’re very happy here and settling more and more as each year passes, but if money weren’t an issue, we’d be back home in Dublin in a heartbeat!