And what do you do? Oh, I’m a journalist. That must be so great since you’re a mum – you must be able to work from home!
And so goes every conversation ever about my job. My answer to working from home? Hell to the no. Anyone who thinks working from home when you have children is a viable possibility is… well, frankly, they’re delusional.
Let me explain five things that REALLY happen when you try to get anything productive done from the ‘home office’.
1. Your family think it’s all an elaborate ruse
The first rule of working from home is well-known: if your children and other half can see you you’re not really working. Your claim to be working from home is, of course, all just a big joke. The man will continue to ask where his keys/sports bag/whatever things he’s lost are. The children will continue to demand food/arse-wiping/your services as a referee in the latest sibling altercation as if you are simply on a nice, well-deserved, day off.
2. The dress code is super-relaxed
Ok, it’s not relaxed like smart-casual, it’s relaxed like pyjamas. Pyjamas with encrusted food down the front. It’s also perfectly acceptable to be dressed in a shirt and suit jacket from the waist up for conference calls while staying in your pink gingham fleecies and slippers from the waist down. Unless, of course, the postman comes to the door and looks at you like you need some sort of community case worker.
4. Your desk has Rice Crispies stuck all over it
Unless you have one of those fancy out-in-the-garden-shed-offices (oooo check you), then your desk is likely to be the same place that everyone had their breakfast this morning. This is the point that you realise working from home ain’t never going to match up to your home office Pinterest board. After all, who needs gold plated staplers from Kate Spade when you have the entire Paw Patrol plastic dinnerware collection with added encrusted Weetabix sparkles? Not me.
5. The fridge is a major distraction
If I were to work from home full-time I would be so obese that I would more than likely require a mobility scooter. Eight words written? Good for me! I’ll just reward myself with an aul trip to the fridge. Spinny colour-wheel of doom frozen your word document? No problem my friend, why not take a short sabbatical at the fridge? Important work call to take? Consider opening the fridge and having a nice long lean to admire its enticing contents while you listen to that exciting account of this morning’s meeting.
Do you work from home? Let us know your experiences in the Facebook comments.
