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Parenting

10th Jun 2016

Confession Time: Here’s What I REALLY Don’t Like About Being A Parent

Sharyn Hayden

I love my two children, like I lovvvvvvvvve them so much I sometimes want to eat their faces, know what I mean?

But I don’t always love being a parent and everything that comes with it.

Some days, it all works out ok and some days I question my entire ability to do it at all!

In light of the fact that I am positive I am not alone in feeling this way, I thought I’d share some of the trickier aspects of parenting that I feel can be a challenge:

1. The Feeling

I was a bit stressy before I became a parent but now, the worry is constant (and totally more valid). Are they ok, have I done the right thing, are they eating enough, will I damage them, am I doing enough, did we choose the right school/bike/childminder, are they happy.. the Brain Chats are pretty relentless these days.

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2. The Noise

As someone who likes a lot of quiet, I wonder if I was bananas to decide on two kids and very yappy dog. Mostly it’s fine but there are days when I REALLY need some peace and just can’t get it. I find those days hard because you know it’s not their fault – they’re crazy, fun and loud kids who need to be themselves – but I get stressed because A) they’re bothering me and B) I shouldn’t feel like they’re bothering me. Those are the days when I go for a walk alone as soon as I can AND I take a camomile tablet to try to relax.

3. The Admin

If I’d known how much paperwork was about to come with my kids, I may have hired someone on the JobsBridge Scheme to deal with it. Certs, papers, cards, consent forms, appointments, passports, post office accounts, school application forms – gah!

4. The Responsibility

I can totally file this under ‘Adult Pains’, I know, but there are some days when you would just like to ‘not’ parent. Yes, we can engage the kids in duvet or movie days if we want to slack off from being a BUSY parent that day, but if you’re sick, bereaved, having a scrap with the other half, depressed – you still have to put a smile on and be that parent your kids need you to be. And of course you do that for them, but sometimes it’s just a hard day.

5. The Explaining

I’m not talking about answering to ‘Where do the stars go during the day, mammy?’ – I love answering those questions – I mean explaining my change of lifestyle to the rest of the world. ‘Why can’t you come to Spain?’ Because kids. ‘Why can’t you come out drinking at 2pm on Friday?’ Because kids. ‘Why haven’t we seen you for so long?’ Because kids and because you have yet to visit us. THAT kind of explaining.

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6. The Body

I’m not talking about my wonky boobs or my sagging bum, but the aches and pains! There is SO much lugging around to do when you have kids – I pick up so much stuff off the floor that I reckon I am doing about 80 squats a day. Consequently, my back is giving out and possibly giving up. Send a stretcher.

7. The Things That Haven’t Happened Yet

My kids are only 4 and almost 2, but I can’t help fretting about their safety in the world as they grow up. Will my son be one of those guys who gets picked on during a night out by a random thug on the streets?  Will my daughter worry too much about her looks and weight as I did growing up? I try really hard to push those kinds of thoughts away as soon as I am aware of them, but they seem to be always there.

8. The Other Mums

So many of my friends are having babies now and when you have small kids of your own, it’s frustrating because you’d love to help out more. You get distracted with keeping your little family together that you don’t get to lend a hand the way that you’d like to. I am petitioning for us all to live on a commune together until the children turn 20, please and thank you.

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