Raising your children like this way could make them more successful in life 3 years ago

Raising your children like this way could make them more successful in life

As parents, we are often lead to believe that in order for our children to do well in life, we need to expose them to sufficient stimuli and the right education and activities.

Cue flash cards and Baby Einstein and an endless string of piano lessons and Gymboree classes.

However, a new study published in Psychological Science points out that when it comes to academic success, it might just be something very different that matters the most.

Drawing on 10 years of data on kids, this new study has tied together three earlier established theories and what is becoming much clearer, is that what matters the most in predicting how well children will fare in life, is how sufficiently attached (emotionally) they are to their parents.

Lilian Dindo who studies psychiatry and behavioural Sciences at the Baylor College of Medicine, explains to Mom.me that this study proved for the first time a link between attachment, control and academic success.

Attachment parenting


“No one has actually shown that three-way link," Dindo explains. "That attachment does lead to effortful control and effortful control does lead to better academic success—that something at the age of two or three can predict something in the early teen years."

The practical takeaway? Parents can be educated on how to be better attached.

Note that for purposes of the study, "attachment" refers to the way parents respond to children who are in distress. Meaning, you can teach someone to be receptive to a child’s distress in a way that’s warm and receptive and kind and gentle and loving instead of teaching "Don’t cry, suck it up, don’t be afraid, don’t be anxious."

It is also worth noting that emotional intelligence is also a predictor for academic success – and that this is certainly not only defined by IQ.