Saying YES to the sisterhood: An open letter to my daughter 8 years ago

Saying YES to the sisterhood: An open letter to my daughter

Dear Daughter...

As a woman writing this letter to her little girl, I know a little of what life has in store for you.

I know your early years will be filled with people who love you and people that you love.

I know that both men and women will tell you how beautiful you are, but rarely ask you what you are reading.

I know that, at each stage of your young life you will seek out your independence fiercely – from tying your shoelaces to walking to the shops alone for the first time.

I know, over time you will make friends, change friends and lose friends.

Those friendships will be based on issues of the utmost importance – such as a joint love of My Little Ponies, ownership of a Soda Stream or being in possession of a Hollister hoodie.

During your teenage years your girlfriends will be your everything – you will share secrets, clothes and boys with them. You will love them, but not yet fully appreciate the importance of their presence in your life.

I know that, as you grow, many of your generation will think that feminism is no longer A Big Issue.


Sadly, I also know that, at some stage you may come to mistrust your fellow sisters.

If you go to college, you may spend the next three years of your life thinking that attention from guys is more important than friendship and save all the good stuff for them. It isn't.

When you enter the workforce, you may find yourself pitted against your sisters. Seek out the woman who urges you to look up and be more.

If the time comes for you to enter motherhood you may be wary of all those other 'better' mothers out there. Put your fears to one side and open up about just how hard it is. Trust in 'The Sisterhood.' Chances are they are feeling just the same as you.

When you think you can not go on another day from the exhaustion of sleep deprivation – it is 'The Sisterhood' who will pop around to mind the baby while you grab a 30-minute nap.

When your children leave you despairing and silently screaming for help – it is a call to 'The Sisterhood' that will save you.

When your father dies/marriage breaks up/house goes on fire – 'The Sisterhood' will be there, at the right time, at the right place, saying and doing all the right things.

When you realise you have made it through the toughest times and are ready to have some fun again – it will be your girlfriends ringing your doorbell.


And while now, your female friendships revolve around Snapchat and sweet shops – one day they will be your lifeline, your safety net, your blanket to wrap yourself up in.

Whatever path you take in life – every time you get the chance, make sure you say yes to 'The Sisterhood.' Hold them close, help them grow and make them strong – because one day they will be the ones holding you up and catching your fall.

How do I know all this?

Because I have lived it.

And because I am part of 'the sisterhood' too.

Your loving Mother.


Kate is a mother of three living in Co Wicklow. She spent her 20’s travelling, her 30’s getting married and having babies, and is now hitting her 40’s newly single, and back in her old hometown. She has written parenting features for the Irish Independent and the Huffington Post and currently earns her pennies working for Netmums and writing freelance. You can find her most days drinking strong coffee on her blog Kate Takes 5, or sipping gin on Twitter.