Why our second child didn’t use a soother

My approach to parenting has changed a lot over the years.

When I was a first-time parent to Jacob in 2011, I wanted to be a 'Super Mum' and put myself under huge pressure to follow 'the rules' with regards to feeds and sleep, whilst simultaneously going back to work too early and scrubbing the floors like a maniac at 6am. (That phase didn't last too long). I eventually relaxed, and then enjoyed being relaxed so much that I perhaps relaxed TOO much on the rules and did silly things like let him drink gallons juice which he became totally addicted to, and didn't pay attention to a consistent bedtime routine, which I think contributed to a run of night terrors. Anyway, we all make a hames of a few aspects of this parenting lark, and that's fine. Thankfully, neither of the above were particularly fatal and we were able to correct them to get things back on track. From birth, Jacob was very attached to his soother and a €4 toy frog that we bought from Ikea - 'Froggie and Dodo' were a permanent fixture and he would't go anywhere without them. (Froggie stank of stale milk so bad, by the way, that I literally had to boil wash him in a pot when Jacob was asleep once a week). When our daughter Eva came along, we tried her with a soother, but she simply wasn't interested in it, so we didn't push it. She's almost two now and has never seemed to want one - even though we have re-introduced them here and there in an attempt to see if it would help her soothe to sleep at bedtime. But no, the little woman knows what she wants, and soothers are not on her agenda. As a mum, I've organically landed on a 'Let Them Lead The Way' approach - so if she isn't interested, I'm going to let her call the shot on this one. Now, I'm not suggesting that we should let our kids run amok - I'm big on teaching manners and educating them about living safely in the world. I'm always ready to give a nudge with their development - whether that be moving onto solids, potty training or encouraging them sleep in a 'big kid bed' - it's not like I let them fend for themselves! But, you know, as much as we say 'each parent to their own' - I think it's each kid to their own too. Join the conversation on Twitter @HerFamilyDotie