I am starting to wonder if anyone ever died of heartburn, this is where I am at with my chronic pregnancy-induced heartburn at this point. Clearly, heartburn is not life-threatening, but I fear I could actually pass away at this stage through sheer goddamn irritation. Why won't it just piss off? Oh yeah, probably because I have a 10 lb baby in me, and I can't stop eating spicy curries, bread, and grapefruits – it's become a choice of either satisfy the cravings or skip the heartburn. 5 Natural Remedies For Gaviscon-Guzzling Pregnant Women With Raging Heartburn: 1. Eat a banana Apparently bananas contain natural antacids that can act as a buffer against acid reflux. 2. Eat a teaspoon of mustard (seriously) Eating mustard straight from a spoon sounds like fighting acid with fire, but allegedly its alkaline properties actually help neutralise the acid from the heartburn. I'm going to go do it right now and will report back... ...Okay, that is MAD. That totally just worked. At first, I couldn't tell because it seemed like I was just replacing one burning sensation with another but now that the mustard-burn has subsided, I am enjoying a heartburn-free moment for the first time since I woke up. Amazing. 3. Chew gum So this isn't the most natural remedy ever but worth a shot I guess. The science behind it suggests that chewing gum increases saliva production which in turn dilutes the acid in the stomach. 4. Drink vinegar Drinking apple cider vinegar is literally fighting acid with acid but for some people, their acid reflux is actually caused by a lack of acid in the stomach – to find out if this is you, I'm afraid you'll just have to suck it and see. I tried. I'm never doing that again – my acid reflux is most definitely NOT caused by a lack of acid. Ick. 5. Dissolve bicarbonate of soda in water A teaspoon of bicarbonate of soda mixed into a glass of water sounds pretty disgusting but what on this list doesn't? *shrugs* Because I'm a lovely person, I'm off to the kitchen to test this one out. Okay, I can confirm that this concoction tastes vile. However, it has reduced the heartburn somewhat. Last words of wisdom: Don't lie down. Like EVER. Between now until the baby comes out just remain upright at all costs. Have you discovered the cure for heartburn? Let us know in the comments...