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2nd April 2025
12:54pm BST
Even the best-behaved toddlers will have a tantrum every now and then.
It's a natural thing and something parents shouldn't shame them for, but there are ways for us to help toddlers when they're having a tantrum.
We believe in dealing with a tantrum in the most gentle way possible, but there's one phrase you should avoid.
Parents have been advised to use the phrase, 'I can see that you’re upset’ during a tantrum.
However, a parenting expert has confirmed that the phrase may be causing more harm than good.
Paediatric occupational therapist Emma Hubbard told her YouTube followers:
"You’ve been told when you say this your child will feel heard and seen and will calm down, but surprise surprise, the tantrum doesn’t stop.
"So there you are stuck on repeat mode echoing ‘I see you’re upset’, as if it’s some sort of magic mantra.
"When your toddler is in the middle of a tantrum the thinking part of the brain is turned off," she explained.
"It’s like someone trying to talk to you in the middle of a busy crowd; it’s hard to focus and take in what’s being said," Hubbard added.
What parents should do is maintain a comforting presence and remain quiet. It's important to let your child feel those feelings, even if they're negative.
Simply being there for them is sometimes all you need to do.
Hubbard said: "Rather than repeating yourself as you try to comfort your toddler, just say it once.
She also suggested staying with them as they process their emotions.
Do you agree with her parenting tip?
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