This is why all mums cannot stop obsessing over THESE two drinks
If you have a quick scroll through the Facebook and Instagram feeds of your fellow mums, you are bound to notice A LOT of posts seemingly centred around the same two things: Coffee and wine.
Now, we know these are both lovely things to sip on but have you ever wondered why it is that mums, in particular, seem to need these two beverages so much more than anyone else?
Well; let me enlighten you.
THIS is why we NEED the coffee:
1. We might have been awake 11 times between bedtime and the iPhone alarm going off at 7am, meaning that in reality, as opposed to most other humans, our day begins at bedtime. So by the time morning rolls around, we DESPERATELY need a little pick-me-up.
2. We usually have 27 things we need to have done by 8am. Coffee makes this more possible.
3 .We need our eyes to open fully, not half-way, because that could just be dangerous.
4. Who has time for solid food in the morning?! Coffee IS our breakfast.
5. Because cocaine is illegal.
6. We are just nicer humans after coffee. And MUCH better mothers.
7. Because it just taste SO flipping nice!
8. We are less likely to murder our husbands (who did NOT wake up 11 times during the night) after coffee.
9. We are trying to avoid the withdrawal headache we get if we miss our morning coffee.
10. Because we had a teeny little glass of wine last night, and we need the coffee to shake it off.
Which brings me neatly to the next part.
THIS is why we NEED the wine:
1. We have not sat down ONCE between breakfast and now (when it is practically bedtime). Jeez, how else are we meant to wind down?!
2. It is a celebration that bedtime has come around yet again.
3. We need something to take the edge off the coffee withdrawal.
4. What else would we be drinking at this time a night?!
5. It goes so well with dinner (can't argue with that one, hah!)
6. Us mums ALWAYS worry about something (bullying, meningitis, when we last managed to make time for sex with our husbands etc.). Wine gives our minds a much needed break.
7. Just BECAUSE.
8. Sometimes (when we do remember how long it was since we had sex with our husbands) wine gets us in the mood for some romance.
9. A glass of wine a day is GOOD FOR YOU. The doctors even say so! Plus it came with the M&S Dine-In dinner. Which means it was practically free!
10. Because getting into a vodka or tequila every night is a slippery slope.