Search icon

Parenting

25th Aug 2016

Psychologist David Coleman: 5 Tips For Tackling The Starting School Anxiety

Sophie White

Families around the country are gearing up this week for that all-important day: The First Day Of School.

For many of us this day is accompanied myriad emotions – shock that we have a child of school-going age, anxiety that the other kids won’t be nice, mild worry that our own little darling might bite someone, terror of the wallpaper/sticky clear plastic book-covering may never end, the list goes on.

We spoke to psychologist and all-around purveyor of good sense, David Coleman about the starting school transition.

“Predominantly that anxiety around starting school is parental anxiety, not the anxiety of the child. The child doesn’t necessarily know what to expect, so they won’t be anxious unless their parents are anxious. So it comes back to role modeling, if we appear really stressed about the transition, it will definitely stress out our child, so it is worth faking a bit of confidence about it. If you pre-empt the anxiety by assuming that it will go badly, you will create a self-fulfilling prophecy and it will go badly.”

5 Tips To Remember About The First Weeks Of School:

1. Your child can cope. Most children now have experienced being away from home at playschool and having another adult being in charge. So it’s not that huge a transition.

2. Everybody saying, “Oh you’re off to big school now” heightens the drama without necessarily helping things! It’s all about the newness of the routine, as parents it will throw up teething problems but it’s important to know that most kids will settle down after a few weeks.

3. Not every child hates school; some love the social element, the academic element, the challenge of it, some of them see it as a real route to the future. Not every child has a negative experience of school. Lots of children have a negative experience of the hassle of school, things like the early mornings and the homework can make it a bit of a chore. Establishing those routines early can make a big difference. Get them home, give them a snack and get the homework done straight away and then they can play.

4. From your child’s perspective, all change creates unpredictability, whenever we don’t know what to expect it increases anxiety, so it’s a natural experience for the child to be unsettled.

5. For most kids, it’s about being calm about the process ourselves and knowing that it’ll take a couple of weeks to settle. Remind children of a previous experience where they have coped, for example meeting their playschool teacher for the first time. It helps them to realise that they can cope with this new challenge.

Bonus Tip:

“This too shall pass,” is also good one to remember!

David Coleman is spokesperson for Pharmaton’s Back to School Campaign. The Pharmaton Kiddi range helps parents to give the best nutrition to their children and to assist with healthy physical and mental development, by providing essential vitamins and minerals such as Vitamin D and calcium. This is vital to help each day get off to the best start, especially during the busy school season ahead. Visit Pharmaton.ie for more helpful hints and tips.

Read more on those first day jitters: