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27th February 2019
11:49am GMT

7. The Incubator is really, really tired. The Impregnator needs to understand that he has never experienced anything CLOSE to the tiredness she is experiencing now. To you, asking her to put the kettle on may seem like a totally reasonable request that doesn't warrant her flying into an immediate rage, but remember for her in her haze of tiredness every activity she has to perform feels like she is wading through a vat of thick-set custard after doing a high intensity training session while wearing a medieval suit of armour.
8. The Impregnator needs to respect that all the disgusting things that are happening to The Incubator (the leaking nipples, the loss of bladder control) are NOT disgusting but all a part of the miracle of life, Assh*le.
9. The Impregnator needs to stop pissing The Incubator off right now. We respect that a lot of really random things piss her off these days, Incubators are delightfully unpredictable like that, so tread carefully. No comments about her weight or her face or her mood swings, either say absolutely nothing or if you must speak just tell her that her limbs are looking remarkably toned and positively Jennifer Aniston-like.
10. The Impregnator needs to know that The Incubator is right about everything because ... well, you know... hormones. And don't eat anything in front of her if you don't have a spare one in your pocket. And just don't annoy her.

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