Are you feeling feel stressed right now? Exhausted before you actually get out of your bed each the morning? Are you being pulled in a million different directions every day – literally and figuratively? Do you struggle to recall the last time you had one whole hot cup of tea? Are your body and mind both craving for just. five. minutes. peace. please?
Chances are you’re a mum then. And I’m guessing, if you explain how you feel to anyone around they will tell you what you need is a bit of ‘Me’ time. Why not have yourself a nice bubble bath, or go out for a coffee? Or go for a walk? Or sit down and read a magazine?
But hold on there just a minute. Since when did we have to feel pathetically grateful for having a bath? Pre-kids wasn’t this just, erm, having a bath?
Likewise going for a walk used to be – going for a walk. Reading a magazine was – reading a magazine. And having a coffee was – well, a basic human right at the very least.
Strangely, since becoming a single mum last year I have actually had more time to myself than I had in the previous ten years.
What I have learned since then is that:
a The more time to yourself you get – the happier you actually become. And the happier you become – the better the mum you can be.
b You think they can’t cope, but they really can. Once you are out of the picture your partner will manage admirably. They may even enjoy it.
Of course, it can be difficult grabbing those moments to yourself when day-to-day life is so busy. So what I would recommend is blocking off a couple of full weekends on the calendar. Go away with the girls, stay at your mothers… just make sure you explain to your partner just how tired/stressed/head-wrecked you are and exactly how much you need this.
After a couple of such weekends you may even find they start grabbing the baby off you the minute they walk in the door, begging you to go and have a nice relaxing bath/walk/coffee.
You see, when it’s that or another weekend on their own with a houseful of nappies and sleepless nights you might be surprised how much ‘me time’ suddenly opens up to you.
Enjoy…
Kate is a mother of three living in Co Wicklow. She spent her 20’s travelling, her 30’s getting married and having babies, and is now hitting her 40’s newly single, and back in her old hometown. She has written parenting features for the Irish Independent and the Huffington Post and currently earns her pennies working for Netmums and writing freelance. You can find her most days drinking strong coffee on her blog Kate Takes 5, or sipping gin on Twitter.
