From the minute we become mothers, we are showered with an overwhelming amount of advice from the other mammies in our lives.
The road to parenting is paved with The Irish Mammy’s good intentions. Here are the top five pieces of old-school parenting advice that you’ll hear from your mother and granny that should stay firmly where they belong – in the past.
1. Don’t buy anything until after baby is born
Ok, we get that ye olde Irish women were a superstitious bunch but seriously? Nobody wants to be hitting IKEA with a screaming newborn in tow. Even the delicious meatballs aren’t worth that stress.
2. Toughen up your nipples
Yes, because bleeding nipples should definitely be at the top of your pre-birth to do list. Putting your nips out of order before baba even arrives seems inadvisable to say the least.
3. Don’t hold that baby so much
You’re going to spoil that child… You’re making a rod for your own back you know… Just wait for the look on her face when she sees the sling you ordered. Shur your back’ll only be broken.
4. Let him cry
Letting your newborn know you’re not there for them in their time of need = super advice.
5. Gripe water
Banned you say? Just drive over the border you say? Eh… we’re trying to parent here, not bootleg hooch during the prohibition era.
6. A drop of whiskey
The Irish Mammy has teething troubles sorted. Just give that baby some potentially poisonous hard liquor. Just to be clear granny, a teaspoon of brandy or whiskey could be enough to intoxicate an infant, as well as cause hypoglycemia, seizures and respiratory failure. So keep it for yourself, if your mammy comes to stay you’re gonna need it love.
