I’m all for setting achievable goals, I am, but throw in two full-time working parents, two crazy kids and a stubbornness to admit we are not 18 anymore, and good intentions just lose the battle. Bread, red wine and chocolate usually win. Every January.
So, this year, I’m not quitting the usual things – carbs, booze, processed foods – and I’m not taking up the one thing I always delude myself with – jogging – instead, this year, I am quitting:
1. Negative energy
It’s like holding onto a dense, heavy emotion at the back of your mind. If you think you have negative energy you might do one or all of these things: blame others for your own problems; are reactive and speak before you think; tell everyone you see the same negative stories; beat yourself up all the time; assume the worst will happen every time; think negative thoughts before positive ones.
Any of these traits apply to you? Well, don’t worry, these really easy solutions might just make you annoyingly positive in 2016: start by doing something that makes you happy every day – even if it’s just for five minutes. Think before you speak – just give a momentary pause instead of saying what immediately comes into your mind. Write down three things you are grateful for every night when you get into bed – on your phone or a scrap of paper. Shift your negative stories in your mind, rearrange them to be positive – even if you’re not entirely convinced – the more you think positive, the more it will eventually affect your subconscious.
2. Guilt
Have you had it with feeling bad all the time? I beat myself up with this big stick every day – feeling guilty about not seeing the kids while I work, guilty about eating too much sugar, drinking too much coffee/wine/whiskey, not seeing my parents enough, not giving my partner enough of my attention… where does it get me? Just more drained and knackered in the long run. And do you know what? I need that mental head space, so guilt, you can feck off back to 2016. Here’s to a healthier mind, more mental and physical energy, and more acceptance of the things I need to do to get by each day with my sanity intact.
3. Rushing
Now, here’s the conundrum: you are a parent. Therefore you spend your life on fast-forward. Always rushing, always late, always forgetting things, always doing things half-arsed. Well, here’s the thing, what if you slowed down just by 20 per cent – would your day be that much different? If I miss my train in the morning (most mornings!), will it really make my day dramatically different? If my daughter is five minutes late for school, will the world end? Here’s to slowing down a tiny bit, and realising that I am doing two jobs as best I can, and some days, I’ll just have to accept I can’t do it all as perfectly as I had hoped. Not racing around like a crazy person might just make me take stock a bit better, give me more clarity to do things with added caution, and who knows, the less-frantic me might get more done in the same time, and be happier because of it. Here’s hoping!
2017 – come and get us. We’re ready for ya. Just not for quitting coffee/wine/chocolate/bread… just yet.
