When I was pregnant, other people were always telling me about the new life that lay ahead of me. Unfortunately, not all of what they told me was positive.
While some of it turned out to be not too far off the mark (mostly the stuff about sleep – or lack of), a lot of it was NOT the kind of stuff that a first-time mum-to-be really wants to hear. In fact, I was subjected to so many negative stories that at one point I wondered to myself why anyone would choose to have children, if these tales of terror were anything to go by.
The unhelpful pearls of wisdom seemed to come at me from everywhere – parents, non-parents, friends, family, strangers, neighbours – but it’s only when my daughter arrived that I realised there were so many things that people neglected to tell me. Like all the brilliant stuff that lay ahead.
Yes, parenting can be a tough gig at times, but there is also heaps of good stuff about having a kid in tow. (That’s why so many people have more than one of them, isn’t it?)
Looking back, I feel like some people were so busy scaremongering that they had forgotten to focus their attention on the good, and all the ways that parenthood can enhance life.
Here is some of the stuff that I think people should have told me when I was pregnant…
1. Childbirth
Instead of terrifying the life out of me with horror stories about giving birth, it would have been MUCH nicer (and less terrifying) if they’d have told me how special the day I became a mum would be.
2. Sleep
Instead of telling me that I will NEVER sleep again, they forgot to tell me that, in fact, I will sleep again. Although there is obviously a lot (A LOT) less sleep taking place during those early days, being woken up throughout the night by my newborn was actually more rewarding than tiring. Promise.
3. Weight
Instead of recommending ways to lose the baby weight, they would have been better telling me that I would probably have WAY more important things to worry about than being skinny when the baby was here. And that I would be back in my skinny jeans and dreaming of elasticated waistbands before I knew it. Because time flies and weight drops when you’ve got a baby in tow.
4. Relationships
They weren’t wrong when they said that relationships change when you have a baby. However, my husband and I may not go out for dinner as much as we used to (understatement), but watching him be a Dad would more than make up for the lack of dinners out. Seeing him change nappies, clean up puke and play with dolls in a high-pitched voice is comedy gold. And pretty damn cute.
5. Emotions
Yes, there are A LOT of hormones and tears when you become a mum – they were right about that – but what I didn’t hear about was all the happy tears that I would also cry. Almost 18 months on and there are still a lot of happy tears – mostly at ridiculous stuff.
6. Socialising
My social life is definitely not what it used to be, but people never told me that when I did finally get to go out with the girls, I would be itching to get back home after just a short time away. And not just because I was so goddamn tired.
7. Life
They were right when they said my life would change forever. But what they forgot to add was that it would change for the better, and in more amazing ways than I could probably imagine. Mind blown.
