New mum furious over in-laws’ ‘quite hurtful’ actions after newborn’s birth

The birth of a new baby can cause friction in families.

A new mum has told how she was left feeling "very hurt" after her in-laws decided to announce the brith of her first child - before she and her husband could. The Mumsnet user explained that her partner had specifically asked his parents not announce anything about the birth of their child as they wanted to be the ones who did so. She said that his parents, who are first time grandparents, decided to share the news anyways. The mum explained:

"They were definitely excited to finally have a GC [grandchild] but while me and bub were sleeping (I was dozing in and out as I was in labour for 24 hours) my DH [dear husband] called them, 3 hours after DC was born. "They wanted him to call the minute DC was born so weren't happy. "Then MIL must have said something like 'can you announce something on facebook' to which he replied 'no, we will do that once we are home' ( he also said she said to 'hurry up' because they couldn't wait any longer).

"I was at the hospital and still while DH went home to rest overnight and his phone started going off with congratulatory messages from people. "Then he called me and we were both furious. "Apparently it was a family group chat that [they] announced it on. "So it's good that its not necessarily ON their page they still disobeyed us by telling others when we told them not to. "Quite hurtful and really I'm not sure if they only did it because I didn't allow them to visit us at the hospital or if they were generally excited. Could be both."

While some parents said that this kind of situation wouldn't actually both them, many felt that the in-laws had been out of line with what they had done. One person said that it was simply "bang of out order, [it's] not their news to tell. I'd be raging." Another added:

"I always tend to think people are very ott about new babies on these threads (we enjoyed visitors straight away, didn’t have ‘rules’ etc and were fairly relaxed) BUT I think YANBU - it’s common courtesy to understand its your news to announce."

Someone else wrote:

"In general I don't think it's a big deal, but since they had been told not to, they definitely shouldn't have done it."