What the ‘heartbeat hug’ is and how it can help calm temper tantrums

Hands up if you've been personally victimised by a tantrum.

Just about every toddler on the planet has had a temper tantrum at some point. They are very little people with very big emotions and sometimes those big emotions explode out like a volcano and it's always easy to know what to do. Often times we try to regain the upper hand by scolding our children or punishing them but this can just lead them to become even more wound up. The truth is a lot of the time when toddlers throw tantrums it's because they don't yet have the verbal skills to communicate their needs and become frustrated. In instances like this understanding and kindness are your greatest weapons against tantrums. If you're not familiar with the 'heartbeat hug' it's a brilliant tool to have to help calm an emotional toddler. The idea behind the heartbeat hug is to soothe your child by synchronising your heartbeat and breathing with that of your child. By bringing your child towards you and holding them close for a few moments they will slowly start to mimic your breathing pattern, slowing their breathing and beginning to calm themselves down. The idea of using comfort as a way to diffuse tantrums is something that a really love. I hate having to yell at my children and I've always felt awful after all the times that I have. Recently I started to use the heartbeat hug with my two-year-old and I have to say it works. There is the odd occassion when I have to resort to bribing her with some BabyBel cheese but for the most part it's been a success. I think as modern day parents we are slowly but surely moving away from the idea that children should be seen and not heard and starting to treat them as we would expect others to treat us.