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Family dynamics

18th Feb 2019

New mum upset with mother-in-law for holding her newborn before her

The woman was recovering after an emergency C-section.

Anna O'Rourke

The birth of a new baby can cause friction in families.

A woman has shared her upset at her mother-in-law getting for intruding after her newborn daughter’s birth.

After a traumatic delivery that ended in an emergency Caesarean section, the woman claims her husband’s mum let herself into the room unannounced while she was recovering.

Her husband had called her prior to the birth “as he was so shook up and wanted some support,” the Mumsnet user wrote on the forum, according to the Huffington Post.

The mother-in-law is a doctor, she explained, and works in the same hospital group as the one she was giving birth in and came down to the hospital after the birth.

“She was able to obtain access to the recovery area with her work access card and just let herself in without permission,” she said.

“I wasn’t asked if it was OK that she could be there and because I was being stitched up on theatre still, she held my DD (darling daughter) before I even got to.”

The woman said she was angry and upset about this as she and her husband had agreed not to see visitors for at least a day after the birth, “let alone have MIL (mother-in-law) there before I’d even held my own child.”

The woman’s doctor came in and disclosed some “very personal” medical information in front of her mother in law, she added.

She continued that she was “livid” with the midwives and upset that her husband hadn’t advocated for her more.

“I’m actually in tears this morning thinking about it all again and so angry and upset still.”

She said she didn’t want to upset her husband by bringing it up further.

 

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