It’s certainly a really powerful message.
Popular parenting blogger, Gylisa Jayne, recently posted to her Facebook page, describing how behind the statistics, the reasons for how women choose to feed their babies are complex and varied.
We reached out to Gylisa, who is based in Cornwall, and asked if we could share her message with the HerFamily community. Here is her original post in her own words…
Breastfeeding is hard. Bottle feeding I can imagine, is also hard. Having someone undermine your decisions for your babies, is reeeeally fucking hard.
I was once in an online ‘baby group’ of around 100 women. We were all pregnant together, had our babies at similar times – and we shared our experiences with trust.
Of 100 of us, only around 30 percent breastfed for the first 6 months.
The national statistics for women physically UNABLE to breastfeed, is less than 5 percent.
So that would mean that the remaining 65 percent of ladies in my group, chose not to.
When these ladies are faceless strangers, it seems to provoke other faceless strangers into attack mode.
These women DIDNT DO WHAT WAS BEST. How DARE they? How COULD they?
But I knew these women. I knew their babies names, their worries about birth. I listened when they spoke about their fears, I laughed with them when we dissected the truth about motherhood.
Some of them lifted me up when I needed it, they gave me advice only the Veteran Mums would know. They reassured me when I felt I couldn’t do this. They were there when no one else was.
I didn’t see women that couldn’t be bothered to ‘ do what was best’ for their babies with feeding.
I saw real, raw women – that struggled.
Some were alone, and didn’t have the guidance I had. Some were mothers to other young children, and didn’t have the time I had. Some were uncomfortable, some were in pain, some could simply not deal with the mental demands that we aren’t TOLD ABOUT when we begin a breastfeeding journey.
They did not fail. They didn’t decide to ‘not bother’.
They struggled. Some of us do. Not everyone has the level playing field that we do. That is part of life – we KNOW that.
Parenthood is no different, some of us struggle massively with it. Some of us don’t. Some of us have help. Some of us don’t. Some of us know what to expect. Most of us don’t.
Telling a woman she is wrong for feeding her baby how she chooses, isn’t you being a concerned parent… It’s being an asshole.
