A little over a year ago was my due date. D-Day. It came and – as I looked out my window and saw my next-door neighbour who was due two weeks later head to the hospital – it went. Hindsight is a wonderful thing. Looking back now, I would have spent the next ‘extra’ five days very differently.
Don’t get me wrong, I’d love nothing more now than a day to myself bouncing on an exercise ball, eating curry, but I thought I was ready for my bundle of joy to arrive. I wasn’t.
Here are a few things I’d say now to my heavily-pregnant-clueless-about-breastfeeding-self:
Say “yes”
When someone asks if you plan on breastfeeding don’t reply, ‘Well, I’m going to try.’ Confidently say, ‘Yes, of course, I am.’ Declaring you’re going to nurse your baby doesn’t automatically mean you have to buy a pair of Birkenstocks and stop dyeing your hair. Believe in yourself and your choices, even if you have to fake it ’til you make it. It’s that confidence, along with sheer determination and hard work that will get you through the first few hours, days and weeks.
Turn off the TV
Seriously, how many times can one girl watch One Born Every Minute? You know everything there is to know about birth. It’s the moments after they hand you the baby that you need to start thinking about. That’s when the real ‘labour’ begins. And no, don’t dig into the box sets either. Save those. You’re going to need them. Pick up a book instead…
The bible
Oh, the scourge of baby brain. Your mind will never be the same again. Use what little brainpower you have left to read The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. It is the breastfeeding bible and covers everything you’re going to need to know. Once you’ve finished it, pack it into your hospital bag. It’s the perfect book for dipping in and out of once the baby arrives
Group on
The final days of pregnancy should be spent chilling out, but I say, put on that slap, pull on those maternity jeans and get out-and-about one last time. Your local breastfeeding group will be invaluable once baba arrives so get a head start and meet them now. I know, I know, you’re not a ‘groupie’ but, honestly, neither is anyone else. A breastfeeding group is not an all-singing-all-dancing-topless-cult. It’s a group of mums, just like you, who happen to breastfeed their babies. They drink tea, coffee and have the chats and are the perfect bunch of new friends to have when any issues arise (or when you need to have a rant about your other half).
The group leaders have their mobile numbers online. Add yours to the contacts of your phone, in Case of Emergency. If you’re not getting the support, you need in the hospital call them. There is no such thing as a silly question, and there is nothing they don’t know.
Oh, and you’re right in thinking the hospital antenatal breastfeeding class isn’t quite cutting it. If time and money allow, get yourself along to a private lesson. They can be found all over the country. Nicola O’Byrne in Dublin and Clare Boyle in Cork and Limerick come highly recommended (the HerFamily.ie can vouch for them, too).
Virtual Reality
You’re petrified your waters are going to break as soon as you leave the house. You wish. But I get it. Don’t worry, there is a wealth of support and information online including some phenomenal closed Facebook groups and excellent websites. Add www.kellymom.com and www.nbci.ca to your favourites and make sure you have a look at Dr Jack Newman’s videos.
Nesting
Contrary to what we see on TV, breastfeeding doesn’t have to happen in a rocking chair under the flickering light of a cherry blossom tree. No trees needed for this nest. Pick the comfiest part of the couch, where it’ll be easy to feed in the laidback position, and set up your feeding station. This is where you’re going to spend the majority of time over the next few weeks as you care for your nursling through the trickiest trimester of them all – the 4th. You’ll need those box sets now and the remote control and cushions and snacks and more water than you ever thought imaginable. Breastfeeding, at first, is ridiculously thirsty work. Whatever you choose to drink from make sure you can drink from it hands-free. A straw is a great idea. Have the fridge loaded with even more drinks and the freezer full of food. One-handed snacks are the best. And cake. Every new mum needs cake.
Sleep
While Bubs is still baking spend as much time as you can sleeping. In a matter of days you’ll be laughing at your ‘But it’s so hard to sleep with a bump’ self. They say preparing for labour is like preparing for a marathon. Forget that. It’s time to get ready for the Ironman Competition and ‘the marathon’ is only one part of it.
Sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture for a reason and yes, the first few weeks will hurt but embrace them. The Baby Moon will be over before you know it and in the blink of an eye your newborn won’t be so new. Besides, all of the hard work you’re about to put in will be worth it a zillion times over, and then some.
Basic instinct
Remember, even though you’re a newbie, maternal instinct has been around since the beginning of time. Trust it. And repeat after me ‘There is almost always a breastfeeding solution to a breastfeeding problem. Every feed counts. Never give up on a bad day. Never give up on a bad day.”
Ciara Whelan is a first-time mama; proud owner of one baby girl and her dada, five cats and fifteen pairs of Converse. She is a keen tea drinker though it has been nearly eleven months since she got to finish a full cup. When Ciara isn’t playing peek-a-boo or singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, she makes her bread and butter producing TV commercials and programmes, the latest of which she also presents alongside her partner Jon Slattery for TV3.
