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16th Mar 2016

11 Ways Being A Parent Is Exactly Like Being A Celebrity

People who think celebrities have it MADE, clearly have not thought about the hardship these people go though in their day-to-day lives.

I mean; celebrities have to deal with constant pressure to perform, crazed and intrusive fans, a calendar that fills up with engagements and must-attend events quicker than you can utter the words “need a day off”.

It must be exhausting.

You know; kind of, a little bit, sort of, just like being a parent, no?!

No, seriously, I am not crazy. Hear me out here. I swear being a super-star celebrity and being a parent is exactly the same thing:

1. Someone is always pulling at you

Boundaries, people!


2. Everyone wants your attention All. The. Time.

I know! It’s exhausting being that person the universe revolves around!


3. Crazy fans follow you to the bathroom

Seriously, you creeps; let me pee in peace.


4. If you say something you wish you could take back, prepare to have it repeated to you for all eternity

“Clearly, what I really meant, was….”


5. Someone is always screaming your name

See point #2 above….


6. You are permanently that little bit out of touch with reality

ISIS? Cheryl Whatshername? Sorry; I have places to go (creche, mostly. Or Tesco) and people to see (doctor, dentist, the dry-cleaners…)


7. You can’t go anywhere without a full entourage

Invited somewhere? My crew comes too.


8. Sometimes there is a different person in your bed every night. Sometimes even two

When you’re popular, you’re popular. What can I say…


9. You never arrive on time for anything, ever

Eh, the traffic…. the au pair… (*blames everyone else)


10. You wish everyone would have more respect for your privacy

Please, can I just eat this meal without someone coming up to me asking me to sign (read: colour in) something?!


11. Your fans are always SUPER -EXCITED to see you

It’s a real confidence boost, you know!